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- What Would Happen if You Only Eat Meat?
More and more people are singing the praises of a carnivore diet. They say it helps them with weight loss, that it cures issues they have with their gut, cures problems with their skin and even more extreme health issues such as joint pain and rheumatoid arthritis have been cured. Some have also claimed it has cured autoimmune diseases. People have also reported improved moods, a dissipation in anxiety and depression. On the other end of the spectrum are people who say that a meat-only diet is the worst thing you could do. They say it causes inflammation, it contains too much saturated fat, it raises your level of triglycerides, it moves you closer to cardiovascular disease, cancer, and type 2 diabetes. Most regulatory agencies around the world suggest you should increase your intake of fruits and vegetables and reduce your consumption of fatty meat, and only eat meat that is lean. They also say to reduce saturated fats. In this blog, we will endeavor to answer the question of whether a meat-only diet is harmful, who it may help, and why. If it does work for us, the next question is whether this is the optimum diet for us and if so, for how long should we pursue this? The most common objection to the carnivore diet is that it will lead to a deficiency in vitamins and minerals because we all believe that fruits and vegetables are the best sources of these vitamins and minerals. The belief is that meat does not contain these things. The reality is that meat does have vitamins and minerals provided you eat enough. One kilogram of meat has 60 percent of your required thiamin, 150 to 920 percent of vitamin B, 120 percent of potassium, 200 percent of iron, and 30 percent of vitamin C. As far as vitamin C is concerned, if you add organ meat like liver into your diet, you get to 100 percent of your recommended daily requirement. You will notice that we are still below 100 percent in a few of the vitamins and minerals. What you need to consider is that when you reduce carbs and focus only on meat, your body becomes more efficient in using its vitamins and minerals because it is no longer competing with glucose. Another point is that we are not 100 percent sure how RDAs were calculated. What we do know is they were tested on mice. In addition, actual food was not used. Scientists made use of synthetic isolates. The bottom line is that we don't know if the same results would be seen in humans using real food. This is not to say that the RDA is useless but there are solid reasons to not follow these guidelines religiously. In reality, people who have tried this diet have not experienced scurvy, have not displayed adverse symptoms, and have found this as a life-saving diet after having tried almost every other diet. Another objection to the carnivore diet is the lack of fiber. We have been led to believe that fiber is the only thing that enables our bowels to move - it is the only thing that provides volume to your stool. New research is showing this to be false. While some notice problems initially, with time these issues of constipation go away, and by and large most people do well. Why may the carnivore diet help? Most people will only try this if they are really not feeling well and are open to anything. They have tried increasing their vegetable intake, they have cut out junk food, they have tried keto which is no carbs and high fat and protein, and they have tried intermittent fasting. Most people in this situation will start to feel better. But what happens if this doesn't help? Those with autoimmune issues then cut out foods with lectins and if even that fails, they go carnivore which is the ultimate elimination diet. You are literally cutting out everything except for meat. Meat is the neutral food there is. Very few people have meat allergies. The only people that will have problems with a meat-only diet are those that do not have enough stomach acid to digest the meat. The carnivore diet is a high-fat and low-carb diet. So who might benefit from this diet? If you experience chronic bloating, irritable bowel syndrome, inflammation, skin rashes, or any autoimmune disease, this diet could work for you. Maybe you are simply curious about how you will perform on this diet. If you do decide to take this route, the next question is for how long. Humans do tend to take the approach of all or nothing. Is a carnivore diet optimal forever? Maybe not, but try for a week, or a month or 6 months. Thereafter you can start to add a little variety. Start with some neutral plants - if they make you feel bad, then remove them. When it comes to vegetables, consider the following. Plants are living organisms and they want to continue living. The big disadvantage they face is that they are not very agile in getting away from predators because they are rooted in the ground. They have defenses in the form of poisons and this is why most plants in the world are inedible. There are thousands of toxins and defense chemicals that they use. The most common are lectins, cyanide, phytates, tannins, oxalates, hormone disruptors, and nutrient blockers. Plants and animals are in an evolutionary arms race. The plants are trying to be more and more poisonous so that fewer and fewer animals are able to eat them. Animals are also adapting so that they are able to stomach more plants. Brussels sprouts alone contain over 100 carcinogens. Have you ever wondered why they cause belly pain, gas, and either diarrhea or constipation? No wonder hate these things - on some subconscious level, they know they are going to kill them. This view believes that plants are trying to kill us. Let's dig a little deeper into this to see if there could be some truth in this. There are 340,000 different plant species in the world, yet the panda only eats one type of plant, grazing animals only eat one type of grass, giraffes know what they can and cannot eat, and they know that if they eat the incorrect plant, it will make them ill or even kill them. Another thing you need to take into account is pesticides. When you hear that word, the natural reaction is to think of industrial pesticides. It has now been found that plants generate their own natural pesticides and that they have 10,000 times more natural pesticides by weight than industrial-sprayed pesticides, and these natural pesticides are more likely to cause cancer in humans than industrial pesticides. Twenty of the forty-two toxins tested in rats were carcinogens and included apples, bananas, carrots, and mushrooms. Mushrooms are a good example. There are 10,000 kinds of mushrooms of which only five are edible - the rest will kill you or give you a hallucinogenic experience. Humans assume that those other five that do not kill us or get us high are not only edible but they are also good for us. That is quite a wild assumption to make. But don't take my word for it, you are more than welcome to look on the website of the World Health Organization. They say that natural toxins cause a wide range of adverse health effects and pose a serious threat to humans and livestock. Acute effects include diarrhea, allergic reactions, and even death. Long-term effects include immune and reproductive issues and even cancer. Lectins are proteins and antinutrients in plant foods. Antinutrients are compounds that can interfere with your body's ability to digest and absorb other nutrients. Legumes, like beans and lentils, have especially high amounts of lectins. Eating raw foods that contain lots of lectins can cause digestive problems. Other foods high in lectins include nightshade vegetables, such as tomatoes, potatoes, goji berries, peppers, peanuts, and peanut-based products, such as peanut butter and peanut oil. Consider now the cassava root - an important staple food for many people in tropical regions. It is the primary source of calories for half a billion people in the world. Consuming cassava in its raw form or improperly prepared can lead to cyanide poisoning. Symptoms of cyanide poisoning can include headache, dizziness, confusion, nausea, vomiting, and in severe cases, seizures, and coma. Another lethal vegetable is bitter almonds which also contain a very high level of cyanide and can be toxic if consumed in large amounts. Then we have oxalates. Oxalates are a type of organic acid found in many plant-based foods. They are naturally occurring compounds that are present in varying amounts in a wide variety of fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds, and grains. Oxalates can form crystals in the body when they bind with calcium, which can lead to health issues such as kidney stones and other related conditions. Some foods that are high in oxalates include spinach, rhubarb, beets, nuts (such as almonds and cashews), chocolate, and tea. Excessive consumption of tannins, especially from certain sources such as unripe or undercooked fruits, can cause gastrointestinal distress, interfere with nutrient absorption and contribute to the formation of kidney stones. Tannins can also potentially bind to proteins and reduce their digestibility, which may affect the availability of certain essential amino acids. Foods and beverages that are high in tannins include red wine (especially those made from varieties such as Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, and Shiraz), tea (black tea, green tea, and oolong tea all contain tannins, with black tea having the highest tannin content), coffee (coffee beans also contain tannins, especially those that are roasted longer and have a darker color), grapes, nuts, dark chocolate and certain fruits and vegetables (apples, blackberries, blueberries, persimmons, and eggplant). Then we need to talk about seed oils. Some seed oils, such as soybean oil, corn oil, and sunflower oil, are high in omega-6 fatty acids, which in excess can promote inflammation and contribute to the development of chronic diseases such as heart disease, type 2 diabetes, and cancer. Additionally, some seed oils are extracted using chemical solvents, which can leave behind harmful residues in the oil. Therefore, it is important to choose high-quality seed oils that are cold-pressed or expeller-pressed and preferably organic to ensure that they are free of harmful chemicals and contaminants. Finally, there are chemicals that will mess with your reproductive system. These chemicals can be found in various products, including some foods. Here are some examples of foods that may contain hormone disruptors: Conventionally grown produce (non-organic fruits and vegetables can be exposed to pesticides and herbicides that may contain hormone disruptors) and soy products (soy contains isoflavones, which can have estrogen-like effects in the body. So, give the carnivore diet a go for a week and see how you feel! #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- Best Exercises for Longevity
If you want to live longer, the single biggest thing you should do is exercise. To understand this consider the following. Smoking and diabetes will increase your risk of premature death by a factor of between 2 and 3 times. Elite-level cardiovascular fitness reduces their risk of all-cause mortality (the risk of dying from any disease) by a factor of 5. You can therefore loosely say that exercise is twice as important as any other factor when it comes to calculating longevity. There are no drugs in the world that will reduce the risk of mortality by a factor of 5. A simple improvement from a sedentary to a state of mildly fit results in a three times reduction in all-cause mortality. Smoking increases your risk of all-cause mortality by 40 percent. That does not mean you will live 40 percent less, instead, it means your probability of dying from any disease is 40 percent higher than a non-smoker. High blood pressure is a 20 to 25 percent increase in all-cause mortality. Now we need to look at high to low strength. Someone that is considered low strength had a 250 percent increase in all-cause mortality. How do you define strength? Strength is defined with simple metrics like leg extensions (how long can you hold a weight on the leg extension machine relative to your body weight), squats (how long you squat with your back to the wall and your legs bent at a 90-degree angle as a measure of quad strength), grip strength and pull-ups are four examples. Basic exercises would be deadlifting your body weight for 10 reps, dead-hang for at least a minute, wall sitting for at least 2 minutes, and doing a simple VO2 max test on the treadmill to test your cardiovascular strength. Kenneth Cooper created what.is known as the Cooper Run Test in 1968 as a way to estimate the VO2 max for military personnel. He set up a 12-minute run test where soldiers ran as fast as possible for the length of the experiment and measured the distance traveled. After, the same runners measured their VO2 max in the lab. He found a strong correlation (0.897) between the distance run and the measurements taken after the treadmill test. So you can do this simple test. 1) find a flat area to run 2) use a fitness tracker or smartphone to set a timer and record the distance 3) run as fast as you possibly can for 12 minutes 4) try not to throw up 5) enter your results into an online calculator like this one (www.exrx.net/Calculators/MinuteRun) Make a note of your VO2 max reading. You want to be in the 75th percentile depending on your age. In other words, you want your reading to be above the following: 20-29 years of age: 55.2 30-39 years of age: 49.2 40-49 years of age: 45.0 50-59 years of age: 39.7 60-69 years of age: 34.5 70-79 years of age: 30.4 These tests serve two purposes. Firstly, they show you have a base level of strength which should at least result in a 2-3 times reduction in risk of all-cause mortality. Secondly, unless you are able to do these tests, you should not even be thinking of supplements because you will be wasting your money. So, if you want to work towards some goals in your quest for longevity, aim for the following: 1) VO2 max in the 75th percentile (see above) 2) Farmer carry your body weight for 2 minutes 3) Dead hang for 2 minutes 4) Deadlift your body weight for 10 reps 5) Wall sitting for 2 minutes Good luck #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- Everything You Know About Cholesterol is Wrong
From a young age we have been taught that fat is bad - that if you eat plenty of bacon and eggs, it is going to clog up your arteries and cause a heart attack. Then there are the people that have high cholesterol - a group that I belong to. Ever since being diagnosed with high cholesterol in my late 20s, I have been terrified of foods that are high in fat - such as the aforementioned bacon and eggs, butter, fatty fish, etc. I then discovered that there is good and bad cholesterol. The doctor gave me a choice - either take medication or do plenty of exercise. Given that I am an exercise nut, and I do eat healthily, I took the second option, but every time my cholesterol was checked, the bad cholesterol (LDL) always came out above the maximum level. So let's go into a little more depth on this. What is cholesterol? It is a lipid and is synthesized by every cell in our body. That means that every cell in our body makes cholesterol. Cholesterol is necessary to create cells. When you think of cells, you often think of these two-dimensional cutouts. In reality, they are three-dimensional and they are fluid, and what gives them their fluidity are their membranes, and it is the cholesterol within those membranes that provide this fluidity. Without any cholesterol, there would be no cells, and without cells, we would not exist. Cells are the basic building blocks of all living organisms, including the human body. They play a crucial role in carrying out all the necessary functions of the body. They provide the structural support needed for organs and tissues to maintain their shape and function properly. Cells generate energy through cellular respiration, which converts glucose into ATP (adenosine triphosphate), the primary source of energy for the body. They also transport molecules such as nutrients, oxygen, and waste products throughout the body to ensure that all cells receive the necessary nutrients and remove waste products. Cells also play an essential role in the body's immune system, fighting off pathogens that can cause disease and infection. Finally, cells communicate with one another through chemical signals, allowing the body to coordinate its various functions and respond to changes in the environment. Now that we know how important cells are for human life, it is also worthwhile looking at the other functions cholesterol plays in our bodies. Cholesterol is a precursor to several hormones, including estrogen, testosterone, and cortisol. These hormones play important roles in regulating a wide range of bodily functions, from sexual development to stress response. Cholesterol is also necessary for the production of vitamin D, which is essential for healthy bones, muscles, and immune function. It is a key component of bile, a substance produced by the liver that helps to digest fats in the small intestine. Not all the cells in the body have enough cholesterol which means it needs to be transported to where it is needed. There are certain cells that are net exporters of cholesterol such as the liver. As a general rule, the liver makes more cholesterol than it needs whereas there are parts that are net importers because they need additional cholesterol, especially during times of high stress. This creates a bit of a problem because the main channel we use to transport things back and forth is the circulatory system. It is not the only system (we also have the lymphatic system) but the circulatory system is what we tend to use the most. There are lots of things that we transport without much difficulty through the circulatory system such as glucose and electrolytes because they are water-soluble. The circulatory system is made up of plasma and proteins (your blood). Cholesterol is a lipid and it is not water-soluble. It is hydrophobic and it cannot move in water. For example, if you pour olive oil into a glass of water you will quickly see how they repel each other. So this creates a problem. We have this essential thing in our body. Transportation for this thing is essential for our life but the system we have repels it. The solution is to create a vehicle in which we can transport this cholesterol and that vehicle is called a lipoprotein. As the name suggests it is part lipid and part protein. It is engineered in a way that the lipid part is on the inside while the protein part is on the outside, and protein is water soluble. This is the perfect transporter because it can be stored inside and transported to where it needs to go. These lipoproteins are found in the blood and are classified based on their density which reflects the proportion of protein to lipid in the complex. There are four major classes of lipoproteins, but for the purpose of this blog, we will only focus on the two most famous- low-density lipoproteins (LDL) and high-density lipoproteins (HDL). LDL is often referred to as bad cholesterol because it was believed that high levels of LDL in the blood can contribute to the buildup of plaque in the arteries which could increase the risk of heart disease and stroke. HDL is referred to as good cholesterol. They are smaller and denser than LDLs, and they have antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties that may help against the development of heart disease. There is an assumption that cholesterol causes heart disease. Scientists are now discovering that the greatest cause of heart disease is inflammation, which can lead to insulin resistance and/or oxidative stress. There is a very strong correlation between cardiovascular disease and these three things. On the other hand, there is a very weak correlation between cardiovascular disease and cholesterol. There is no difference between the cholesterol in LDL and the cholesterol in HDL. This means there is no such thing as good and bad cholesterol - that is a myth.
- World's Most Interesting Man: Why the Electric Vehicle was Killed 100 Years Ago
It is a well-known fact that Henry Ford and Thomas Edison were mates - they lived in the same neighbourhood, were friends on Facebook, and would exchange lavish gifts. Before that, Henry’s first serious job was as an engineer with the Edison Illuminating Company of Detroit in 1891. It, therefore, comes as no surprise that Henry was not always a petrolhead - in fact in the early years, he was more into electricity than he was internal combustion engines. Ford looked up to Edison, 16 years his senior, and often referred to him as the greatest man in the world. Ford and Edison formed half of a group named the Vagabonds (the other half being Harvey Firestone - one of the first global manufacturers of automobile tires, and naturalist John Burroughs) who were known to head out into the woods every year on glamping excursions. In 1899, Edison began working to develop an alkaline storage battery that could better support the electrical needs of a motor vehicle. Unsurprisingly, Edison was no fan of the internal combustion engine, saying: “Electricity is the thing. There are no whirring and grinding gears with their numerous levers to confuse. There is not that almost terrifying uncertain throb and whirr of the powerful combustion engine. There is no water circulating system to get out of order – no dangerous and evil-smelling gasoline and no noise”. He soon started to convince Henry Ford that electricity was the way to go (although it has to be said, that Henry had already started to develop the Model T). In early 1914, word had gotten around that work had started on a low-priced electric car. Reports appeared in the Wall Street Journal, in trade magazines, and in other newspapers as far away as New Zealand regarding Ford's foray into electric cars. Ford himself even confirmed the rumors in the January 11, 1914 issue of the New York Times: "Within a year, I hope, we shall begin the manufacture of an electric automobile. I don't like to talk about things that are a year ahead, but I am willing to tell you something about my plans. The fact is that Mr. Edison and I have been working for some years on an electric automobile that would be cheap and practicable. Cars have been built for experimental purposes, and we are satisfied now that the way is clear to success. The problem so far has been to build a storage battery of light weight which would operate for long distances without recharging. Mr. Edison has been experimenting with such a battery for some time". Henry may have been stretching the truth a little by saying there were several prototypes that had been built, it is known that at least one came into existence in 1913 known as the Edison-Ford. As the year wore on, the rumor mill pegged the release of the electric car for 1915, then 1916. Details on the car varied: It would cost somewhere between $500 and $750, and it would range somewhere between 50 miles and 100 miles on a charge. Edison himself, in an interview with Automobile Topics in May 1914, divulged no details and made his best "It's coming, just be patient" speech and added, "Mr. Henry Ford is making plans for the tools, special machinery, factory buildings and equipment for the production of this new electric. There is so much special work to be done that no date can be fixed now as to when the new electric can be put on the market. But Mr. Ford is working steadily on the details, and he knows his business so it will not be long". "I believe that ultimately the electric motor will be universally used for trucking in all large cities and that the electric automobile will be the family carriage of the future. All trucking must come to electricity. I am convinced that it will not be long before all the trucking in New York City will be electric." The project then mysteriously died which begs the question, what happened? There are numerous theories, but allow me to regale you with my favorite. Enter John D Rockefeller, the world's first billionaire. Yes, he was the first oil barron, and he initially made his fortune in the kerosene market. There were no automobiles at the time, so he focused exclusively on the illumination of households. In 1885, Rockefeller wrote to one of his partners, “Let the good work go on. We must ever remember we are refining oil for the poor man and he must have it cheap and good.” Or as he put it to another partner: “Hope we can continue to hold out with the best illuminator in the world at the lowest price.” His well-groomed horses delivered blue barrels of oil throughout America’s cities and were already symbols of excellence and efficiency. Consumers were not only choosing Standard Oil over that of its competitors; they were also preferring it to coal oil, whale oil, and electricity. Millions of Americans illuminated their homes with Standard Oil for one cent per hour; in doing so, they made Rockefeller the wealthiest man in American history. In the production of kerosene, one of the by-products is gasoline, for which there was no use at the time. It would either be burned or pumped down the river. Imagine, therefore, how Rockefeller’s ears pricked up when he heard that Ford was developing a gasoline-powered engine and an electric-powered one. It does not take a genius to realize that Rockefeller and Edison were not good friends - it was unlikely that the former would receive an invitation to the annual glamping event. They were sworn rivals. Edison wanted to illuminate homes with electricity while Rockefeller wanted to keep pumping his foul kerosene into the maps of the middle to lower class. Then Edison comes along and wants to build an EV with Ford! There is every reason to believe that Rockefeller, the world’s wealthiest man, was able to convince Ford to scrap his plans for an electric vehicle and double down on his plans to build the world’s largest motor company fueled by the by-product of his kerosene business. With this, the EV was killed and the internal combustion engine dominated the roads for the next 100 years. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- Men Need to Kill the Lone Wolf
Men love to subscribe to the lone wolf principle - life alone, die alone. We love the idea of living alone in the woods, living off the fat of the land, hunting for our food, and building a cabin. We think this is the textbook definition of an alpha male. While there is nothing wrong with being able to survive in the wild and be resourceful, men were never biologically designed to live in isolation. We are social beings. We need accountability because we are so distracted. Talk is cheap and execution is in short supply these days. We, humans, seem to be taking procrastination to new levels. We are so overwhelmed by all the distractions. I am not immune to these. While writing this blog, I am looking at new trucks I want to buy, checking on the price of Bitcoin, and checking the message my girlfriend sent me. This blog should have been written and published, but here I am still typing away. It is Sunday evening at 6.30 pm. If I had promised a friend that this blog will be published by 7 pm, the dynamic of procrastination gets turned on its head. Instead of fucking around with the myriad of distractions, I would be attacking this blog like a master. Accountability is powerful. It creates a bond between men - it creates responsibilities and generates action. Here are 3 benefits of being part of a tribe. 1) It Kills Anxiety What happens when you feel anxious? You feel small and passive. Your self-preservation instinct kicks in as you do everything to protect your vulnerability. The only way to get you out of this funk is through action, but this is where it gets a little tricky. Every bone in your body is telling you to retreat - you need to find a way to go against your instincts and your caveman's brain. In my experience, the best way is through accountability. You need to commit to action and ask a brother to hold you accountable for that action. The solution could be as simple as getting out of bed and going for a walk. Send him a Strava of your walk, do a video call with him while you are out on the walk - do whatever is necessary to force yourself into compliance with the action you have committed yourself to do. The first thing you will notice is that your anxiety will subside, and you will start to think clearly. Anxiety is all in your mind. It is that negative little voice inside your head saying you are a piece of shit and that you deserve bad things happening to you. The best form of action is getting out the front door - putting some physical space between yourself and the scene of the crime. That physical action will gag your inner devil, throw him in the trunk of the car, allow your inner god to jump over the seat and ride shotgun with you, and remind you of your sovereignty and mastery over your emotions. 2) It Helps us Battle Loneliness Men are lonelier than ever, and there are many reasons for that. The first is the curse of working from home. Sure you can now work in your jocks, and fix the toilet while on a conference call (struth, you can even be on the toilet during your Monday morning meeting). Have we ever taken the time to think of the mental toll of working in isolation? Men are social creatures - we were not designed to jump from one Zoom call to the next. We are designed to hunt in groups. Working from home had made us more isolated than ever. The second factor is the increase in divorce. We all know how marriage and divorce play out for male friendships. Wives always control the social agenda - and the majority of social interaction is with their friends. When the marriage ruptures, husbands realize that most of their friends were the husbands of their ex-wife's friends - and these men are forced to have no contact with you. Men do not maintain friendships as skillfully as women. Women need no reason to get together. Men need a reason, and our lone-wolf mentality leads us to increased loneliness. How do we respond to this? Do we go out and look for new friendships? Hell no, that would take us back to grade school when we would walk up the cool kid and ask if he wanted to be friends. What do men do the second after a romantic relationship ends - they look for new romantic relationships. After divorce, men jump on Tinder like dogs onto a piece of meat. We are terrified of being alone, and we interpret the need for company with the need to get laid and shack up with someone. We attach our loneliness to the wagon on new girlfriends who have spent a lifetime building lasting friendships. We build a new set of friends - again the husbands and boyfriends of the girlfriends of the new lover. This is a fucked up strategy because when that relationship does not work out we find ourselves in the same dilemma. So not only does our fear of loneliness force us into hasty relationships, it also postpones the inherent need we have of being part of a masculine tribe. 3) Keeps us out of Toxic Relationships Men's inability to be alone means we are less than selective when looking for someone to fill the void left by a broken relationship. We would rather be in a relationship with someone (anyone) than be alone. Middle-aged men make the biggest fuck ups because they throw themselves into the tempestuous seas of single mothers. There is even a term for these women - MILFS - mothers I would like to fuck, and boy, can these mothers fuck. Most of them have won healthy settlements from their ex-husbands which gives them the luxury of hitting the gym in the morning and in the office of their plastic surgeons in the afternoon. The finished product is amazing. Although they know they are in good shape, they understand that with a couple of kids in tow, their sexual market value is waning, so what they lack in sexual market value they more than make up with sexual performance in the bedroom, and the kitchen, and the lounge - anywhere in the house and if you are lucky, also in public places. Men have trouble thinking clearly when in the throes of fantastic MILF sex. Their feelings of loneliness evaporate and they become oblivious to the red flags that are being waved in plain sight. He does not realize that this episode is temporary- single moms are experts in the exit strategy. As soon as she finds someone better than you (either with more money, bigger biceps, or more charm), the delivery of that Dear John letter will run you over like a freight train, and you will find yourself back at square one. Disney has done mankind a great disservice. It has told men that there is one special person out there that will complete their life, and like idiots, we spend our lives chasing a fake dream. What is the solution? Find a band of brothers that can ease these pangs of loneliness. They will not remove the loneliness altogether, but at the very least they will prevent you from being so desperate as to jump into a relationship that will later torment you. For 99% of human existence, we lived in communities. These were groups of twenty to thirty people who lived together, worked together, and died together. Then we started living in apartments, condominiums, and suburbs. We started working with people with whom we did not share the same values. We started eating alone. In 1954, Swanson invented the TV dinner. Millions of lonely people set up their folding tables in front of their TVs. Urbanization and urban densification officially put an end to our tribal existence, and we are now paying the psychological price. So what happens to life outside of this tightly knit community? The first thing that happens is that we become acutely aware of being lonely, and therefore become very concerned about finding that special something/someone that will complete our lives and make us eternally happy. Our need for connection can morph into a strong desire for success, fame, and recognition when maybe all we need is some good friends. Million Man is a tribe – it is a place where we can regroup, lick our wounds, bitch and moan about the women in our lives, and then work on a collective plan to get ourselves out of this hole we are all in. The trick is to unteach ourselves from all the lies we have learned about being a man. Million Man is built on 4 uncompromising foundations: 1) Kindness – high-value men are friendly, generous, and considerate. 2) Shared vulnerability – a tribe is a place where we can be open about our worries and anxieties, and the problems that throw us off balance. 3) Understanding – everyone has their own quirks and idiosyncrasies. We embrace and learn from our differences. 4) Reassurance - we believe that everyone (man, woman, and child) has a special superpower. We have the ability to give something to other people that these people crave, and that is reassurance. We are all haunted by doubts about our value. We are all concerned about the future. We are haunted by things we have done – they cause guilt and embarrassment. Everyone you meet, regardless of who they are, is being plagued by varying degrees of insecurity. Can you believe that even supermodels are insecure of their appearances? These people are desperately waiting for someone to say something to them. Million Man believes in the power of reassurance. Members need to hear they have a right to exist, and that we are on their side. Words like: “I think you are going to be fine”, “everyone goes through this”, “there is nothing to be ashamed of”. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- Maybe Your Expectations are Too High
We live in a world of meritocracy where anything is possible. A reality TV star can become president of the most powerful country in the world, an Austrian immigrant can become a movie star and the governor of California, and a socially awkward kid from South Africa can become the wealthiest man in the world. That puts us under a lot of fucking pressure. Everyone is connected. The world is your market. You can self-publish a book and it can potentially be bought by anyone with access to the internet and $8 in their bank account. You can see more beautiful women in 5 minutes surfing the internet than your grandfather saw in his entire lifetime. You can carry more than half the music ever composed in your pocket. We live in a world of endless possibilities, yet the majority of us feel like failures. How is this possible? You need to understand that equality of opportunity does not equate to equality of outcome. The fact that everyone has an equal opportunity to be successful does not mean that everyone will be successful. Both history and nature paint a very different picture. If you have ever gone on a safari, you will notice that with most species, a dominant male is fucking all the females and a large group of beta males spends their days together dreaming of a life that could have been. On dating apps, a small percentage of men get the majority of the right swipes. In sports, a handful of men score all the points. In business, the wealthiest three American billionaires control more wealth than the poorest 160 million Americans. On the internet, 20 percent of all websites attract 80 percent of all traffic. As of February 2023, almost 94 percent of all search queries are done through Google. We live in a world where there is no equality of outcomes - in fact, the distribution of outcomes is very unequal. So what does that mean for us? We live in a world in which we are told anything is possible. You can meet a girl who is a genius, a concert pianist, a stand-up comedian, and a part-time underwear model. She will be kind, and cook for you every night. You can start a YouTube channel, you will get ten million subscribers and this will afford you a life in which you can travel the world vlogging about exotic destinations. You will be comped first class airtime tickets on Emirates for you and your model girlfriend. You will post videos of you boarding with her and your Louis Vuitton luggage. This is all bullshit. These success stories are outliers. Mr. Beast is one in seven billion. Elon Musk is one in a billion. In the face of these overwhelming odds we still hold onto the belief that if we only nail our morning routines, if we post ten pieces of content on socials, if we outwork everyone else, and if we are prepared to suffer like no one else on the planet, we too will be like Elon Musk. I hate to be the one to tell you this it will take more than a killer routine and a Spartan work ethic to replicate the success of these androids. If you look at highly successful people they all share a number of common traits. They all went against the consensus to develop something that would change the lives of hundreds of millions. They all came to the edge of the abyss in the process, yet they never lost faith. Steve Jobs was fired from his own company. Musk's first rockets launched at Space X were nothing short of a disaster. Tesla nearly had to be rescued by Google. These men were also subject to brutal public ridicule. Musk was rejected by his heroes (the men who landed on the moon). They were told they were idiots and they would fail. Most of us would cede to the doubters, but the truly successful have the vision to block out this noise and power through. This does not mean that we should all be content with a life of mediocrity. We should have lives of fulfillment and purpose. We should seek out responsibility and find actualization in serving others. We should seek to be the best versions of ourselves, but at the same time, maybe we need to redefine success. Maybe the person who owns that weekend house on the beach is also the person least likely to enjoy that house. When he is there over the weekends, he is so busy thinking about his next business trip, his next deal, his next merger that he does not enjoy the cool sea breeze blowing through the sunroom or the beautiful blood-red sunset that only his house on the peninsula gets to enjoy. Maybe he cannot sleep well at night because he is worrying about how the regulators might clamp down on his business dominance, or he is concerned that his senior vice president is planning to leave for a competitor and take his major clients with him. Maybe he has a stomach ulcer and has been restricted to a bland diet for the past five years. Maybe he is overweight with early onset diabetes because the only exercise he gets is getting in and out of his golf cart. Maybe the last time he made love to his wife, who may be fucking the pool boy, was last year. You get the picture. My point is that we often don't see the price paid by these extraordinarily successful people. It is said that Jeff Bezos literally works all the time. He works 18-hour days and on weekends. Are you prepared for such a one-dimensional life, or do you have other priorities? How about your family and friends? Can we not place a high value on a balanced lifestyle that also includes quality time with people we love, time to pursue a passion like surfing or learning the guitar, donating your time to a charity so you can get some perspective in your life and making a positive impact in the lives of others. Maybe there is more to success than money in the bank, the number of subscribers on YouTube, and positive comments on your Instagram reel. Maybe we need to ratchet down our expectations and set our goals more in line with what is reasonably achievable. Again, I am not proposing you sell yourself to a life of mediocrity - I am talking about setting demanding goals in a range of areas where only one metric is money and professional success. Maybe another metric should be how much you love and how much you are loved. Maybe you want to work on the number of people that would be in attendance at your funeral. Think about that for a second. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- 8 Things Men Do to Mess Up Their Lives
Life is hard enough as it is, and sometimes we men make it harder than it should be. This was not an easy blog to write because it is written in a negative tone. I like to be constructive and positive in my language so bear with me while I work through the eight things that we as men do to fuck up our lives. In my defense, I do offer some positive guidance to assist in the process of course correction. 1) We Stumble into Toxic Relationships The German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said you are the average of the five people with whom you spend the most time. If we hang around toxic, manipulative, entitled, and negative people we will soon start to adopt these traits. As we grow older, we start to spend less time with our friends and more time with our significant others - girlfriends and wives. They start to have a disproportionate influence over the way we act and behave. Our choice of romantic partner is one of the most important decisions we will make in our life. In a perfect world, we will make one great choice and we are done. Other people, myself included, need to make this choice a few times and hopefully, we eventually make the right one. What are we looking for in a partner? In my twenties, she had to be hot and available but as I have moved past my half-century, my priorities have changed. Sure physical attraction is important, but as you mature you realize that there are other key qualities such as intellectual, emotional, and lifestyle comparability. But let's get back to the red flags that toxic people exhibit. The first red flag is someone who looks to you for constant validation. We know the motivation of the majority of women that are active on social media. They are looking for validation. When you enter into a relationship with them you will become an additional source of validation. I would therefore recommend spending some time on the social media accounts of your prospective partner, and if they are super active in posting pouty selfies, you may want to steer clear. The second red flag is if she is always negative about current and past relationships. She may complain constantly about her parents, previous boyfriends, or current girlfriends/colleagues. A friend of mine once gave me some interesting advice. When your girl gets home from work and starts rattling off about her shit day, the winning strategy is the following: every 45 seconds say "that bitch is crazy!". Another strategy is to avoid these kinds of women. Sure, even the good ones need to rant a little, but when this becomes part of her daily afternoon routine, you want to run for the hills. The third red flag is when your partner competes with you. You want your partner to support you in your endeavors, your goals, and your ambitions. After all, she is your partner - you are supposed to complement one another and not work against one another. Competitive signs in a relationship include constantly trying to outdo your partner, feeling excited when your partner fails, and finding yourself secretly jealous when they succeed. Does your partner attempt to win every argument? Is there no excitement and pride from your partner when you tell her you just closed a big deal at work? Does she belittle what you have achieved? Does your partner make you feel guilty when you need to work late? Does your partner like to point out what is wrong with you? Does your partner scold you as if you were a child? If you answered yes to any of these questions, there is a high probability that she is competing with you and you need to try and fix this or get out. The fourth red flag is whether your partner is a single mother. This comes with a few caveats because not all single moms are like this, but the majority are. A single mother will always put the interests of her children above you, and that is perfectly natural. In fact, it would be another red flag if she did not. I am amazed by how highly single mothers value themselves in the sexual marketplace. I have seen profiles of single moms on dating sites where they have a long list of things they demand from a man. The reality is that their market value is not nearly as high as they think for the following reasons. They are experts in exit strategies. They have done it at least once before, and they will do it again. If you get involved with a single mom, you need to know this. The sex is going to be great, she will do everything she can to get you hooked on her, but when that attraction wanes or she comes into contact with a better option, she will drop you like a wet sack of potatoes. Trust me - I have experience in this area. Single moms stand by the finish line and pick the winners. In fact, all women do that but single moms are more viscous because they have their own and the children's interests far above your interests. You will be left scratching your head wondering what the fuck went wrong. If you get into a relationship with a single mom, you will observe how she tolerates bad behaviour from her kids against you. When the kids are well-behaved, they are her kids. When they don't, they are "our" kids and she will never take your side against them. Relationships are hard enough - taking on a single mom means taking on a new layer of complexity that will handicap the relationship from the offset. The fifth red flag is the woman's sexual history. Women are concerned about men's futures while men are concerned about women's past. Sex is not simply a physical act. There is a strong emotional aspect to it, and by sex, I am referring to physical penetrative sex between a man and a woman. I am not talking about only oral sex, phone sex, or tantric sex. A woman with a high notch count has given a bit of her soul to each man she has fucked, which means she has less soul to give to you. A woman with a high notch count is like a car with a couple of hundred km on the clock. It is loose, and rattles, things below the surface are broken and it is going to give you a handful of problems in the future. Red flag number six is the lack of shared values. This is a bit of a no-brainer but many men look past this flag, especially if the woman is hot and or is great in bed. Common values are loyalty, openness, prudence, resilience, responsibility, self-respect, and honesty. Out the gate, you can see why the failure to value honesty should be a deal breaker. The problem is that dishonesty is not something that women put on their business cards. Neither is a lack of transparency and impudence. You will need to test for these qualities, and the quicker you can get the blood back to your brain from your penis, the happier your life is going to be. You need to remember that deceptive and manipulative women are experts at what they do. They have been mastering these evil skills their entire lives and you will need to work hard to find the truth. Values also go hand in hand with lifestyle. Does she place a high value on staying in shape, having an active lifestyle, and eating healthily, or does she prefer to party all night, sleep all day and binge on junk food? This kind of relationship will in likelihood lead you to abandon your healthy lifestyle in favour of hers - especially if she is hot and or great in bed. Men are terrible when it comes to compromising their values and lifestyle for attractive women. Red flag number seven is when people you love do not like her. This is a great test because when men are in relationships their thinking and emotions tend to be impaired. There is an old joke that a man's IQ is cut in half when faced with female cleavage - a 50 percent decline per breast! Given this impaired judgment, you need to seek out independent and impartial arbiters, and no one is better suited to this job than people who love you - friends and family. If these arbiters have reservations about her, this is a monumental red flag and one that should be taken seriously. Another red flag linked to this is when your personality changes when around her - it means you are not yourself around her and feel the need to put up an act. Red flag number eight is a victim mentality. There are women in this world who believe the world is conspiring against them. They do not take ownership of their failures, they blame ex-boyfriends or husbands for breakups and do not own their mistakes. She will never admit when she is wrong, will never apologize and her victim mentality is her way of avoiding accountability. You will spend the entire relationship apologizing to these women for things you never did and trying to justify your actions - this is not a happy place to be in. Red flag number nine is that she loves drama. Women tend to be more dramatic than men - this is part of the reason why the majority of soap opera watchers are women (although a recent New York Times article indicated the number of male watchers is increasing!) Women who love drama always have something upsetting happening in their lives and this emotional upheaval is part of their daily routine. They are always fighting with someone, be it a work colleague, a sibling, a friend, or a parent. The final red flag is that she is a toxic feminist and this is where I am going to get into hot water. She will call your masculinity toxic, she will make you feel bad about traditional masculine qualities like confidence, courage, provision, and protection. She will be more than happy for you to pick up the bill at the restaurant, but then make you feel guilty when she washes the dishes, cooks for you, or does anything that falls within the typical female stereotype. Getting into relationships with toxic feminists is too much like hard work, and the sex is unlikely to be great because you will be wrestling each other over who needs to be on top. 2) We Cannot Verbalize Our Intentions and Feelings Men are both powerful and very ineffectual communicators. We are good at motivating other people, at communicating external elements like business plans, strategies, objectives, and goals, but we are terrible at communicating our personal goals, objectives, and strategies. We like tangible things that can be easily measured. We like sales targets, sports scores, and training plans. We can spend hours communicating on these and developing strategies to achieve them, but we are fucking useless looking internally and verbalizing what is happening in our heads and our hearts. We are unable to communicate this to ourselves and to those closest to us and this is exceedingly problematic. There are a number of reasons why we are so chronically bad at this communication. In the past, our rules were clearly defined. Our purpose was to go out and hunt, fight wars, or be fathers/providers/protectors for our families. No one really gave a fuck about how we felt. We didn't have time to deal with these issues because we had no option - we had to be brave, courageous, in control, and focused on the job at hand. These days, most of these roles are evaporated. We have supermarkets, and professional soldiers fighting the wars, and many of us are either single or divorced with limited access to our kids. This means we need to ask the questions - what is my purpose, how do I feel? The truth is that the world does not care how we feel. We form part of the most privileged half of society. We are part of the male dominance hierarchy which means we are not afforded the luxury of having feelings. We have been taught that boys don't cry, that we should suck it up and grow a pair. unless we learn how to communicate our intentions and feelings, we are going to be left behind crippled by our demons. So what is the way out of this? We need to find a safe space within which we can communicate. What does a safe space look like? We need to find a place where we can be completely vulnerable where there can be no fear of judgment and nothing that is said can be used against us at some future date. How vulnerable can we afford to be in front of our partner? This is where things in my opinion get a little tricky. Romantic partnerships are built on many of the same things as non-romantic relationships - trust, honesty, shared values, and vulnerability. There is however one element that is peculiar to romantic relationships and this is desire, and desire is one thing that cannot be negotiated. The desire that a woman has for a man is primal - it goes to the very core of her biological needs, and many men have trouble understanding this. Women will tell you what they are attracted to. If you ask ten women they will get back to you with similar responses. They like someone who is well groomed, confident, interesting, has a good sense of humour, and has a positive economic future. Ask them for the kind of men they desire, there will be an overlap but they typically will have someone like Ragnar from Vikings in mind. That raw physical and sexual appeal of a strong man that doesn't take any shit from anyone and gets things done. Women are often attracted to the bad boy. This has been distilled into the term the dark triad personality traits. The term was first coined in 2002 by Delroy L Paulus and Kevin M Williams. The traits are as follows: narcissism (characterized by grandiosity, pride, egotism, and lack of empathy), Machiavellianism (characterized by manipulation and exploitation of others, and a sense of morality, lack of emotion, and a higher level of self-interest) and psychopathy (characterized by continuous antisocial behaviour, impulsivity, callous and unemotional traits, and remorselessness). Studies have suggested that on average, those that exhibit dark triad personality traits have an accelerated mating strategy reporting more sexual partners, more favorable attitudes towards casual sex, a tendency to steel mates from others, more risk-taking in the form of substance abuse, limited self-control, and a pragmatic and game-playing romance style. These are the men that most women lust and fantasize over. One also needs to understand rape fantasy. Studies have found rape fantasy is a common sexual fantasy among both men and women. The most frequently cited hypothesis for why women fantasize about being forced and coerced into some sexual activity is that the fantasy avoids societally induced guilt- the woman does not have to admit responsibility for her sexual desires and behaviours. So what does this have to do with men having to find a safe space to communicate honestly and showing vulnerability? When you are in a relationship, you want to maintain a healthy balance of attraction and desire. In other words, you want your woman to both be attracted to you and to desire you. I am not saying you need to adopt dark triad traits, but you need to be able to understand that these traits do create genuine primal desire. It also stands to reason that the opposite traits will detract from desire. This means being overly weak, vulnerable, and agreeable may force your woman to have less desire for you. What many men don't understand is that desire cannot be negotiated. Men know that women love men who are handy around the house - guys who can unclog the drain, repair the garbage disposal and fix the washing machine. Men also need to realize that these actions, although they may increase attraction because it shows you are capable and conscientious, they are not going to make her lust after you. My point is this, if you feel your woman's lust for you is waning, unblocking the gutters of the house is not going to get her desire up. Telling her how anxious and vulnerable you feel about the future will do the exact opposite. I am not advocating for extreme stoicism in your romantic relationships, but I don't think complete honesty about your deepest fears and insecurities is a winning strategy. You need a tribe. For 99% of human existence, we lived in communities. These were groups of twenty to thirty people who lived together, worked together, and died together. Then we started living in apartments, condominiums, and suburbs. We started working with people with whom we did not share the same values. We started eating alone. In 1954, Swanson invented the TV dinner. Millions of lonely people set up their folding tables in front of their TVs. Urbanization and urban densification officially put an end to our tribal existence, and we are now paying the psychological price. So what happens to life outside of this tightly-knit community? The first thing that happens is that we become acutely aware of being lonely, and therefore become very concerned about finding that special something/someone that will complete our lives and make us eternally happy. Our need for connection can morph into a strong desire for success, fame, and recognition when maybe all we need is some good friends. Million Man is a tribe – it is a place where we can regroup, lick our wounds, bitch and moan about the women in our lives, and then work on a collective plan to get ourselves out of this hole we are all in. The trick is to unteach ourselves from all the lies we have learned about being a man. Here are FOUR reasons you should join the Million Man tribe. 1) Being Part of a Group There is strength in numbers. When you are part of a tribe, you are accountable to other people. This sense of connection helps to build your sense of self-worth. You become recognized. Your contribution is valued. You feel supported. It takes the pressure off you because you realize you are part of something bigger than yourself. 2) Sense of Purpose Men today are battling to find purpose and meaning. They have no interest in religion and the traditional purpose of being the breadwinner in a family is fading as fewer young people are getting married. Million Man is founded on the purpose of building high-value men. It is this common purpose that will provide you with direction and a sense of purpose. 3) Support “Boys don’t cry”. “Take it like a man”. All these cliches have a place. We are men. We are strong and you can rely on us. But men also need support. We need people to talk to and we need a non-judgmental place to do this. We need a manly tribe. 4) Battling Loneliness The modern world is lonelier than the world that preceded it. We have never been more connected, yet we have never been so lonely. Loneliness is the disease of the 21st century. Million Man aims to put an end to that. 3) We Lack Discipline and Consistency A man can have the greatest skills in the world. He could be endowed with masterful powers of persuasion, ungodly charisma, and unlimited talent when it comes to closing business transactions, but if there is no discipline and consistency, he will always operate below his potential. This goes back to the age-old debate of talent over hard work. Talent can only get you so far if you are unable to couple this with discipline and hard work you will never be more than an also-ran. In the Bible, you will find the parable of the talents in the book of Matthew. The master of a household is about to leave on a business trip and he decides to entrust his property to three servants. According to the abilities of each man, one servant received 5 talents, the second received two, and the third received only one. In this parable, talent refers to an amount of money and not to a physical talent. We also know that at that time, eight talents represented a large amount of money. Upon returning home after a long absence, the master called his servants to account for their activities during his absence. The first two servants proudly announced that they had put the money to work and they both had doubled the money entrusted to them. Servant one returned 10 talents and the second servant returned four talents. The master congratulated them for their conscientiousness. The third servant however had merely hidden the talent. He was risk averse and did not want to incur the wrath of his master should something happen to the money. The master rebuked the servant, calling him lazy and slothful. The master then took one talent away from the last servant and gave it to the first servant. The third servant was then cast out of the household into the darkness where there was weeping and gnashing of teeth. This final reference is believed to be referring to hell. The takeaway from this parable is that it does not matter what talents you have been given, it is what you do with these talents that are important. We live in a world where talk is cheap. There is no shortage of talking heads on social media telling people what to do, and there is no shortage of people that spend most of their time talking about this information. They acquire the knowledge and skills but they seldom implement what they have learned. The self-help industry is built on this need for repeat business. The gurus are more interested in selling their next book, next course, or next training session than truly helping their customers go out into the world and execute the knowledge they have acquired. This is not unlike the healthcare industry. Pharmaceutical companies have limited interest in curing their customers. They have a stronger interest in treating the symptoms for as long as possible. After all, if the customer can find a way to treat the core of the problem, he will no longer need the drugs that the pharma companies manufacture and then lose a loyal paying customer. Someone with lots of time on their hands conducted an interesting study on LinkedIn profiles. They analyzed a large set of professional profiles and focused on two keywords - namely "strategize" and "execute". They noticed that the former verb appeared 100 times more frequently than the latter. This indicates that people spend more time thinking about what they are going to do than they actually spend executing what they need to do. There seems to be an abundance of talent and good intentions out there - but we seem to be a little light on the hard work of putting plans into action and executing them. Men fuck up their lives by failing to get things done. They are not prepared to put in the hard work. They are afraid of discipline and consistency, and there are two reasons for this - the lack of patience and the fear of the thought of hard work. So what can we do to address this? Firstly we need to change our relationship with time. We are impatient. In a world where you can order a taxi off your phone, stream any movie you want in seconds, and access all your favorite songs in one place we have become accustomed to instant gratification. It is a low-value man who is not able to delay his gratification until sometime in the future. It is a weak and ineffectual man who is unable to appreciate the need to make small changes in their life every day and wait for these changes to compound into wonderful transformations in years and decades. Bill Gates said that we overestimate what we can do in one year and underestimate what we can do in 20 years. If you hit the gym now after a sedentary life, will you get jacked in a week or a month? Of course not. It may take you six months before you feel comfortable looking at yourself naked in front of the mirror. Worthwhile things are hard. If they were easy, they would not be worthwhile. Hard things require discipline and consistency, and patience. Let me tell you something that many people fail to understand. The journey is more exciting than the destination. If your goal is to develop a body that could be thrown onto the cover of GQ magazine, how do you think you will feel when you achieve your goal? Sure, you will be stoked to see yourself on the cover, but now that you have reached your goal, the game is over. You now need to find a new game. The real fun was all the workouts, it was the progression, the first sight of developing a six-pack, it was the cute girl walking past you when you were doing leg extensions, it was someone coming up to you in the locker room asking for help on his routine, or a kid asking you to spot his technique on lateral pulldowns. You need to fall in love with the journey and never take your eye off the prize. You need to take delight in not pulling up to the Mcdonald's drive-thru and instead choosing to cook boiled chicken breast and veggies for dinner. The reason we procrastinate is not that we are afraid of hard work, it is because we are afraid of the thought of hard work. Our bodies are made to work long hours, pick up heavy weights, run long distances, and do the hard stuff. Our bodies and minds react well under stress. We need to consistently put ourselves under pressure because this is how we grow and evolve. Humans are not suited to paradise - we need to be moving towards a goal. This is when we feel most actualized and happy. You need to find your purpose and work consistently and diligently towards the goal. 4) We Talk Shit to Ourselves What is the quality of your internal dialogue - those little conversations you have with yourself in the quiet lonely hours of the morning? Do those voices say you are a worthless piece of shit, that nothing good will come of your life, and that you don't deserve to be loved? Or do they say that you rock as a human being? If you are honest with yourself, you have both. Even the most evolved, confident, successful, and fulfilled men in the world are faced with moments of self-doubt, anxiety, and uncertainty. The difference between winners and losers in this world is where you locate these inner selves in the car journey of your life. We all have two selves riding along with us - the one is your inner god and the other is your inner devil. The biggest challenge we face is that your inner devil loves to talk and he loves to talk shit about you, your loved ones, and the people you deal with daily. If he is riding shotgun with you, then you are fucked, because he will drown out your inner devil. The good thing is that he is predictable, in that he seems to tell the same lies to everyone. These lies can be divided into two categories - major league and minor league lies. Let's start with the minors. These are those soft and self-deprecating whispers that seem to be innocuous. The most common is forgetting where you put your keys, or you leave your phone on the roof of your car, or you go away for a weekend, leave the milk out and when you get home it has left a rancid odor in your kitchen. That little voice says you are a bloody idiot. You may even verbalize these incidents to friends, or tell self-deprecating jokes and everyone laughs with you. These small harmless voices are the gateway to the major leagues. Pretty soon you start to build on these negative messages. You go back to events in your childhood. Maybe your maths teacher said you were stupid, or an ex-girlfriend said you were ugly, and then the mind starts to run wild. Your inner devil jumps out of the trunk and is riding shotgun with you. It tells you your mother never loved you, that you are lazy and stupid, and that no one will ever love you. These internal conversations are going to mold your self-esteem. Your job is to master those voices, and the way you do that is simple- make sure it's your inner god riding in front with you and your inner devil is gagged with duct tape and tied up in the trunk. Sure, there will be days when he weasels his way out of the trunk and gets back into the front seat, but you need to be a mercenary and get him back where he belongs. Your internal dialogue has to sound like this: I am awesome, I am the top dog, I am the master of my emotions, I am the master of my money, people want to be around me, I am an important member of my family and community, I can be counted on when things get tough, I stand up for what I believe in, I speak out against injustices, I am fiercely loyal to those that I love, I am not a victim of my past, I am writing my future. You will notice that not once did I use the word deserve. I hate to break this to you but you don't deserve anything. You are not entitled to anything- everything you have is the fruit of your hard work, dedication, discipline, and perseverance. The best way to take charge of your internal conversations is through getting out into the world and getting shit done. The worst way to control the internal dialogue is by being passive, procrastinating, and numbing yourself with comfort and pleasure. Put yourself in difficult situations - instead of scrolling mindlessly through TikTok, hit the deck and do 400 push-ups. Instead of binge-watching on Netflix, hit the gym or go for a run, or cut the grass in your yard. Make your bed, clean your house, walk the dog - fuck, do whatever it takes to be active, and productive, and make a dent in the universe. The Bible says you should despise not the day of small things - small actions repeated over time compound to extraordinary things over the medium to long term. 5) We are Spectators in Our Own Lives I love sports - any sports. As a kid, I used to watch for hours and it didn't matter what sport was on. I would watch five-day cricket games - for those unfamiliar with the colonial sport of cricket, it is like baseball but games can last for five days and it is still possible to end without a result. As I grew up, I watched less sports and started to execute my mission. Now, I hardly watch any sport - I might go to the odd live rugby game in Cape Town, or catch highlights of the Tour de France, or the Ironman World Champs, but now the algebra has changed. I want to be out there executing. I want to do more sports than I watch. There is no time to numb yourself out in front of a TV screen. One massive problem we have today is that there are too many distractions that lead us off the path to fulfillment and the execution of a full life. Sometimes, these distractions are obvious - binge-watching a series on Netflix is an obvious waste of time. Sometimes, the distraction is less obvious because we have convinced ourselves that what we are doing is helping us get closer to our goal, and I often fall into this trap. I am a type A personality. I need to be busy to be happy - I need to be moving forward toward a goal to feel satisfied. When I lay my head on the pillow at night, the only way I can feel satisfied is if I feel physically exhausted. The problem is that often I look back at my day, and I am mortified by the missed opportunities and time wasted watching self-help videos on YouTube. At times I find myself having substituted my love for watching sports, with a love for watching videos about self-development, self-realization, coaching, and motivation. Self-help videos are not necessarily bad things - there is some great content that can be extracted, but let me tell you when they can be bad - when they are used as a tool to distract and delay you from the task of executing your mission. If you want to start a coaching business, you will go online and start consuming content. The algorithm will pick up on this, and start pushing your content. Up until now, all is good. The problem arises when you convince yourself that consumption of this content is part of the strategy and you slip into the role of spectator. Being a spectator is a passive exercise. You will soon pick up that all the content is the same. It is all derivative - it is all based on a few sore principles packaged in a different wrapper. You are wasting your time, and the worst part of it is that you think your time is being productively spent. Strategizing is easy - anyone can sit down and write a business plan. The hard part is execution. Very few people can execute a business plan because that requires hard work, and humans are chronic procrastinators. We are not afraid of work, but we are afraid of the thought of work because our feeble brains will quickly invent ten reasons why we should remain spectators. This goes back to our caveman biology. We are risk averse - we all default to self-preservation mode when faced with a challenge. When our cave-dwelling ancestors were walking through the savannah and came across a pride of hungry lions, they would course correct and give the savage cats a wide berth and pray they would not find themselves on the dinner menu. Why is it that we found it so challenging to make those ten sales calls? Why is it that we are afraid to be more aggressive in answering the objections of a prospective customer? Why is it that we don't speak up when someone makes a racist comment? We are afraid of rejection. We are afraid of what people think about us - we are people pleasers and we will go to the ends of the earth to make sure we are liked. This means we don't like to rock the boat or challenge the status quo. That is why we prefer to be passengers on the outside watching life unfold. But at the end of the day, how does being a passenger make you feel? When you wake up at 10 am on a Sunday morning after binge-watching Netflix until 2 in the morning, do you feel like a winner, or do you feel your time would have been better served by hitting the sack at 10 pm, waking up at 6 am and going for a 10-mile run? There is nothing less satisfying than being a passive passenger in your own life, and not executing your mission. You know that you are destined for greater things. We all have a strong underlying belief that we were put on this earth to do great things - to serve others, to be pillars in our communities and families, and to enrich the lives of others. It has never been easier to be a spectator because, in the history of all mankind, we have never had so many distractions. Take a look at the breakdown of global Internet traffic - 14.9% is Netflix, 11.6% is YouTube, 4.5% is Disney, 3.9% is TikTok, 3% is Playstation downloads, 2.9% Xbox live, and 2.8% Prime Video and Facebook respectively. This means that almost half of the total internet traffic is dedicated to spectator or gaming, neither of which are useful activities. It is then estimated that 35% of internet downloads are pornographic in nature. These are terrifying numbers. The only conclusion is that never before in the history of the world have we been more passive and more distracted, and this is making us miserable and anxious. The best antidote to anxiety is action. If you want to feel small, insignificant, anxious, and depressed, the best thing to do is stay at home behind your laptop scrolling aimlessly through social media, YouTube, and TikTok watching other people run their lives. If you want to be fulfilled, realized, and happy, get out into the world and get shit done without any apologies and free of the fear of what other people think about you. Self-consciousness is your biggest waste of time. No one cares about you, about the car you drive, about the watch you wear, or how much money you have. The world is so wrapped up in its own shit that they have no interest in you. No one cares about that stupid comment you made last month in the sales meeting, no one cares that there was a large piece of spinach lodged between your front teeth when you greeted the boss in the elevator, no one cares about how long it took you to run the New York marathon. They only care about their own shit, and the sooner you realize this, the happier your life will be. 6) We are Not Financially Educated Modern education is a problem for men. The education system is controlled by women. The majority of teachers are women which has both positive and negatives. On the positive side, we learn much about empathy, emotional intelligence, and self-awareness. On the negative side, we learn nothing about traditional masculine traits like providing financially for your family and community. Financial education is never taught in school. Maybe governments, who control the education syllabus and narrative, have no real interest in empowering their citizens. It prefers to preside over a sea of weak, uneducated, and ineffectual idiots. What use is it for me to learn about the difference between igneous and sedimentary rocks when I could be learning about starting a business and the art of selling? Most men are clueless when it comes to money and it fucks up their lives. There are ten steps you need to take to be financially educated and exercise mastery over your money. You need to realize that almost everything you know about money is wrong. You were taught to buy a house, get a job to pay the mortgage, save for retirement, and live paycheck to paycheck. You were taught to work for money. As Robert Kiyosaki said in Rich Dad Poor Dad, you need to make money work for you. The way you do that is to get a career, maximize your earnings capacity, earn more than you spend and invest the surplus in high-quality assets that provide you with a reliable flow of income. So how do you do that? Step 1: Understand the difference between a job and a career. A job is something you get to fund your lifestyle. Let's say you want to live by the beach, drive a luxury German sedan, go away every second weekend, play golf every Wednesday, and build a collection of red wine. With that in mind, you will look for a job that will enable you to make your monthly mortgage payments, make auto loan payments, pay your rates and taxes, pay your country club membership fees and green fees, enable you to travel, and subscribe to Wine of the Month Club. You may earn a million bucks a year and you may spend a million bucks a year. Are you financially free? No, you are a slave to your employer who could fire you at any time, you are a slave to your bank who foreclose on you if you miss a few payments on the mortgage, you are at the mercy of the finance company that is leasing you the Mercedes Benz and you are beholden to the people that expect you to take them away every second weekend. Let's now look at the other side of the coin. After working a job for five or ten years in an area that aligns with your skillset, interest, and passion, you acquire enough skills and contacts to either rise to the C-suite of your company (CEO, CFO, CTO, COO, etc) or you start your own business. Sure, you can still get fired from the C suite, but you may have equity in the company and they will need to compensate you handsomely for the retrenchment. You have maximized your earning capacity. In the case of your own business, you are the top dog. You rent a house by the beach that is well within your budget, you drive a sensible car that gets you from A to B (and you don't look like a university student), you play golf at the local public course, and until the business is up and running you only go away once every quarter. You make half a million a year and you spend 300,000. The surplus 200,000 is either invested in the stock market or other financial assets, or back into your business as you scale and grow. Who is richer? Person 1 or person 2? I can happily accept that person 1 appears to have a better life. You could say that his life is more Instagrammable. On the surface, he has all the trappings of wealth, but his money is not buying him freedom. He has fallen into the wealth trap. The more money he makes, the more things he acquires and these things end up owning him. His scope of choices is made smaller. He is married to his job because his job funds his lifestyle. Let's assume he hates his job. Assume he comes from a long line of lawyers in his family. His great-grandfather was a lawyer, as were his grandfather and father. It was therefore expected he would follow up the family tradition. After his second divorce, he hits a midlife crisis and realizes that he hates being a lawyer. He still had a massive mortgage, three years left on the lease of his car and there is no way out. He has no option but to power through day in and day out in a profession he hates. Let's assume he has lived within his means. He has earned more than he spends, his car is paid off and he has no mortgage. He gets divorced, his kids have graduated from university and he now wants to follow his passion for restoring vintage motorcycles. He has been investing in the stock market religiously for 30 years and his account is worth a couple of million bucks. He has the freedom to follow his passion and live a fulfilled life. He has flipped his relationship with money - instead of focusing all his energy on working for money to fund his lifestyle, he has become a master investor and is now in a situation where money is working for him. He is the rich dad, not the poor dad. Step 2: You need to understand the power of compounding. Albert Einstein said that compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. He who understands it, earns it. He who doesn't, pays it. What the hell is he talking about? Compound interest defies the laws of nature and the best way to understand this is through an example. Let's say you invest 1000 bucks in the stock market every month and the annual return is 10 percent per annum. After 10 years, you will have 204,845 bucks. If you double the term of your investment from 10 to 20 years, what would your return be? Most people would say if you double the term, you double the return. In other words approx 410,000 bucks. The correct answer is 759,368. What happens if you triple the term from 10 to 30 years? Again, simple laws of nature would say 205k x 3 or 615k. The correct answer is 2.2 million! That is crazy. What is happening here? Why are our feeble brains getting wrong? We are ignoring compound interest or compound returns. We are reinvesting our returns. When we earn that 10 percent return, we are throwing it back into the pot. This means that not only are we making money on our 1000-buck monthly contributions, but we are also making money on our profits. Think of this as a snowball that gets bigger and bigger with time. The reason why most people don't understand compound interests is that it needs time to work its magic, and most of us are impatient and we need instant gratification. We are unable to invest today and enjoy tomorrow. This explains why so few people are financially free. Step 3: You need to know the difference between an asset and a liability. This also comes out of the teachings of Robert Kiyosaki. The definition is simple - an asset outside money in your pocket while a liability takes money out of your pocket. Most people think the house you live in is an asset, but it takes money out of your pocket. You pay rates, taxes, insurance, lights, water, and utilities and you may also pay a mortgage. Sure, it gives you a place to stay but that is the only benefit. People may say that house prices always go up. Ask people who bought property in the US in 2007, in Tokyo in the 1980s, the list goes on. Property does not always appreciate in value. If that is your view, then you are speculating and history teaches us that not all bets pay off. Now, if you buy a house and rent it to a third person, then it becomes an asset. Using the same logic, your car is not an asset unless you put it to work in Uber. Step 4: You need to know how the banking system works. Banks do not want you to be financially free. How do banks make money? Through transactional fees and by lending money. The more lending transactions they enter into, the more they can charge in fees and interest. The biggest money maker for them is the mortgage bond - the loan sizes are large and the terms are longer. The compound interest they earn is mindblowing. If you buy a house for 5 million, and finance it over 30 years at 10 percent, you will pay more than 11 million in interest alone. You will pay more than twice the current value of the house in interest. That is a great business for the banks but a pretty shit deal for you the homeowner. The word mortgage comes from an old French term that meant death pledge - need I say more? Banks also facilitate the purchase of stupid shit through credit cards. This is not to say that debt is entirely bad - it does have its uses. If you can borrow money at 10 percent and invest that money at 15 percent, then you are golden. Very few, however, are savvy enough to find these sweet investments, and any investment yielding 15 percent has to be risky. Step 5: You need to understand the concept of risk and return. Risk is not necessarily bad. It depends on your age. The younger you are, the more risk you should take. If you are j your twenties, you are embarking on your financial journey. You have limited wealth and your objective must be to build as much as possible. You are looking for high-return investments which means you are looking to embrace risk. You want to invest in the stock market, cryptocurrencies, new businesses, and new technologies. You do not want to stash your money under the mattress. The reason why even the young are risk averse is that our caveman's brain is wired towards self-preservation. The fear of losing money is greater than our joy of making money. Not even gamblers like to lose money. If you stand outside a casino at 6 am and watch the high rollers leave, you will not find the losers delighting in their losses. Now that we have highlighted the importance of chasing high returns when you are young and being more conservative as you get older, we need to define what is a high return. Every country has a risk-free return. That is the interest rate at which you can invest and the risk is zero. The lowest-risk institution in any country is the government because they normally have the ability to print money. Any return above the risk-free rate requires risk to be taken. So, if the risk-free rate is 5 percent per annum, and the investment offers a return of 6 percent, there is some risk but not that much. An investment of 15 percent is three times the risk-free rate and therefore three times riskier than the government. You need to now be careful of people that guarantee high returns. If someone comes to you and guarantees an investment return above the risk-free rate, you need to know that there is risk in the investment. The best way to manage investment risk is through education. Investing in anything blindly is risky. It is believed that consumers do more research before buying a household appliance than they do research an investment in the stock market. Before you invest in any business, you need to understand basic accounting. Financial statements contain the most important financial information of the company. It shows solvency and earnings capacity - in other words, it will tell you how long they are going to be in business and how profitable they are. You also need to research the market in which the company is operating and the prospect for that market. Blockbuster, before they went bust, was operating in a dying market. Netflix was eating Blockbuster's lunch. People were no longer taking the time to drive to the video store. They were streaming content live. There was no way Blockbuster could compete against these winds of change. You want to avoid investing in a dying sector and you want to invest in sectors that will flourish. What are the sectors of the future - renewable energy, mental health and wellness, e-commerce, financial technology, supply chain and logistics, sustainable business, and disintermediation. Step 6: Do not trust anyone with your money. Humans trust other humans too easily. When they deposit money into their banks, they blindly believe these banks hold their money in a safe box on their behalf. Banks do not operate in this fashion. They operate on a system known as fractional reserve banking and it is perfectly legal. This gives them a license to lend out the money you deposit. So as soon as your money is deposited, it flies out in the form of a loan to another client or even used to buy risky assets like bonds and shares. As long as everything is normal and there is no panic, this system works well. Problems however arise when a rumour surfaces in which the health of your bank is called into question. In this digital age where everyone is so connected, rumours move at the speed of light. If someone influential believes your bank is having liquidity problems, and lots of people hear about this, what is everyone going to try and do? They are going to try to remove their money and this is where the shit starts. Your bank goes into a panic and tries to call back the loans it has made. This is easier said than done and the bank is forced into liquidation and goes bust. The financial system is based on trust. Even the currency issued by the government is based on trust. Do you trust banks and governments? Do you think they have your best interests in mind? Do they want you to be strong, independent, courageous, and questioning everything, or do you think that maybe they want to keep you in the dark, manipulate you, violate your human rights, and enslave you? Before the pandemic, I had my doubts. After the pandemic, I am pretty certain that governments cannot be trusted, and the more corrupt they are, the less they deserve your trust. How do governments control us? Through information and money. If they control your money, they control you. The scariest thing that is happening at the moment in the world of money and finance is the creation of central bank digital currencies and digital IDs. Let me explain to you the end game. Governments want everyone to have a digital ID. It is all your details - your name, age, ID number, tax number, photo, and address. In other words, everything that makes you you. It will be stored on your phone which means they will find a way to track your movements. If they can do that, they could give you a carbon score. Everyone is being made to feel guilty for being a human on this planet. If we travel a lot, we are destroying the planet. It is therefore conceivable that if we get around too much, suddenly we have difficulty buying airline tickets or filling our cars with petrol because all our spending will now be linked to our digital ID by way of digital currencies. Your ID will have a record of all your assets, liabilities, and bank accounts. If they see you are buying lots of red meat, they might cap the amount of money you can use to purchase ribeye steak every month. Or the amount of alcohol, cigarettes, or any other substance the government may be trying to clamp down on - or promote on the other end of the spectrum. This is scary shit, but if you want to get financially educated, you need to take control of your money and trust no one. 7) We Seek Comfort and Avoid Doing Hard Things Men look for comfort. They look for the easy route - the path of least resistance. This is natural. We live in a world that wants to kill us. Volcanos, earthquakes, poisonous snakes, lightning, psychotic drivers. We live in a world where cars pass us by a few inches - the space between life and death is narrow. It is perfectly natural to seek shelter and comfort. Companies know this and they seek to exploit this basic human condition. Food companies get us addicted to fast food, liquor companies get us addicted to booze, tobacco companies to nicotine, and pharmaceutical companies to opioids and sleeping pills. Whenever we have a headache, we pop a pill. When we feel stressed we crack open a can of beer. When we want to escape the world, we go for a movie or turn on Netflix. We spend our lives seeking out numbness and this is making us miserable because it leaves us feeling unfulfilled, guilty, self-hating, and anxious. What is the antidote to this? We need to do hard things. We need to seek discomfort, and we need to use this suffering to build our character so that we can be useful to ourselves and our loved ones when danger presents itself. One of the core functions of a man is to protect those that he loves. He needs to have the courage and the balls to stand up for those that he holds dear. If he has spent his life in comfort, avoiding tough situations, getting fat and out of shape, going with the flow, and numbing out his senses, what fucking good is going to be to himself and more importantly to those he loves? If a war breaks out in his country and he doesn't know how to react, what good is he? He needs to have skills. He needs to be able to contribute to defending his home, his neighbourhood, and his country. He needs to have the balls to lift his hand and say, yes, I am here to serve. I am scared out of my fucking mind, but I have what it takes to rise to the occasion and do my duty. Only men who have tested their limits, who know how to suffer physically and emotionally have the tools to be of service to others. So what does it mean to put yourself in difficult situations? I am not talking about standing in front of a freight train and playing a game of chicken. I am talking about exposing yourself to situations that will make you antifragile. This is a term coined by Nasseen Taleeb. He poses the question - what is the opposite of fragile? Most people argue that it is resilience - the ability to survive under harsh conditions. If fragile is the act of getting weaker under pressure, how can the mere act of surviving under pressure be the opposite? We are looking for something that gets stronger under pressure. Something that flourishes. There is a character in Greek mythology known as Hydra. It is this scary ocean-dwelling monster. Every time you cut its head off, it grew additional heads. It got stronger under pressure. When you put yourself in high-pressure situations, they either kill you or make you stronger. The most famous quote from German philosopher Frederich Nietzsche was that that which does not kill me makes me stronger. This does not refer to resilience, this refers to antifragility. You must find uncomfortable situations every day. If you are afraid of being rejected by women, go out and get rejected as often as possible - soon the sting of rejection will be removed and you will be able to approach anyone - women, prospective clients, prospective investors. If you feel vulnerable physically, hit the gym and learn how to fight mixed martial arts. This is going to be hard and pressurized, especially if you have hitherto lived a sedentary life playing video games and downloading porn. The physical form you create and the fighting skills you develop will make you antifragile. Once a month, do something hard. Walk or run for 42km, carry a backpack full of rocks up a mountain, or swim in the freezing ocean. At the time of doing these things, you are going to be tempted to quit. Power through and you will come out stronger on the other side. You will test your physical and mental limits. It will make other smaller challenges look like a piece of piss. You can start today - when faced with two options, choose the path of most resistance. Take the stairs to your apartment on the 8th floor, walk to the grocery store and back, stop to fix the puncture for the lady in the parking lot, volunteer your time at the homeless shelter, pay the maid for the day but clean your own house, learn how to change the oil in your car, learn to play the guitar. All these things are hard - if it was easy everyone would be playing the guitar like Slash from Guns n Roses. Everyone would have six-pack abs, everyone would be jacked. Find the result least likely and work towards that because in all likelihood that work will make you antifragile. Comfort will kill you. You should never seek it out in your life. There is a reason why immigrants thrive in the United States. They are forced into difficult situations - they have no choice. They need to learn the language, suffer xenophobia, work three jobs, and be creative in adapting to their new environment. Studies show how these immigrants enjoy a disproportionately higher level of financial freedom when compared to their local brethren who were born in the United States. These immigrants find themselves with their backs to the wall - they are thrown into a pressure cooker and what is interesting is that they don't just survive, they thrive and flourish. Look at the list: Albert Einstein, Sergey Brin, Arianna Huffington, Oscar de la Renta, Madeleine Albright, and Arnold Schwarzenegger to name a few. Arnold stands out as a great example- the can hardly speak English, became world-famous for lifting weights, then became a Hollywood movie star, married a Kennedy, and then became the governor of a state of the United States - but not just any state, the biggest state by GDP and the name of which he could not even pronounce. If Arnold is not like Hydra, then no human that has walked the face of this planet is like Hydra. 8) We Go with the Flow Humans are biologically designed to go with the flow. When we lived in villages it was not in our best interests to rock the boat - our long-term survival was predicated on our ability to ingratiate ourselves with the leaders and be team players. This worked well for us thousands of years ago, but everything changed. We no longer live in tribes and small communities - we are globalized, connected, and influenced. Our sovereignty is under threat, and this may sound like a conspiracy theory, but stay with me on this. Have you ever wondered why when you open a bag of cookies, it is difficult to have just one - you end up demolishing the entire packet? When you go to the doctor, he is quick to prescribe a pill to heal your symptoms. When you look at the label of foods, everything has sugar in it. When you wolf down a Big Mac burger, it gives you a hit of dopamine. Banks are throwing credit cards at you, your phone is listening to you, Google is pushing you to travel destinations, and YouTube knows exactly what videos you will find interesting. We live under the notion that we have free will, and that we are in control of our lives, yet we are being hacked every day. We are being told what to eat, what to think, what to believe, what pills to take, what to buy, what to sell - and let me clue you into something, the entities that are ramming this information down our throats do not give a shit about our well being. Think about this for a second - does Mcdonald's care about your cholesterol, does your bank want you to be financially free, does the pharmaceutical industry want you to be healthy, does your government want you to be prosperous? Hell no - they want you to be weak, addicted, enslaved, and controllable - it is good for business and it is good for politics. They are the enemy and nothing gives them greater pleasure than seeing you go with the flow they are carefully constructing. The devil must be looking at the current state of humanity with a huge grin on his face. He has done a masterful job in turning men into a bunch of distracted, feminized, passive, overweight, ineffectual pussies who are ashamed of their masculinity, afraid to go against the flow, and living lives of quiet desperation. They do not have the physical skills to protect their families, communities, or countries, Hollywood makes them out to be a bunch of bumbling idiots, and worst of all, they seem to be ok about it. What is the answer to all this? Men need to question everything. I am not saying we should always go against the consensus, but we need to question the consensus and if the consensus does not make sense, we need to go against it. It is so easy to be seated at a dinner party, and the host makes a racist joke for everyone to laugh at. That is the path of least resistance. The hard part is standing up against injustice. Racism is born out of fear and prejudice. It is born out of ignorance and weakness. Racists are small, scared, and pathetic - they are like the bullies in the playground. They need to be confronted and called out. If you stand up to the host at the dinner party, sure, an awkward moment is going to follow, but I can guarantee you that unless everyone is a card-carrying member of the KKK, the majority of people will applaud you (either audibly or loudly). That may be the last invitation you get from that host, but who gives a fuck. Edmund Burke is often attributed with saying “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing”. Sometimes the cost of standing up against injustice is low - as is this dinner party example, but sometimes it is higher. A prospective client, on the point of closing a lucrative deal with you, may also drop a racist slur, and by speaking out you may lose the deal. You need to ask the question, do I want to do business with a racist, or do I want to do business with people that share my values? On a macro level, are you not a little concerned by how easily you were prepared to let the government strip you of your basic human rights during the pandemic in 2020? I am by no means an anarchist, but forcing people into conditions of quasi-house arrest, and everyone complying without even a small bleat of protest sent a strong and terrifying message to governments all over the world. It told them what they may already have suspected - that they were ruling over billions of weak and insipid men who were not prepared to stand up for their basic human rights. What is the government going to do with this newly acquired knowledge? I suspect they are going to do a whole host of things, and none of these things are good. They are rolling out digital IDs and digital currencies. They are going to track your movements, your spending, your investing, and your saving. This opens the doors to social scoring, carbon scoring, and a dystopian future in which our personal freedoms are so curtailed that you will look back favorably to the time when you were a hamster on a wheel that still had the option of jumping off. High-value men question, and they push back against injustice that is not only perpetrated against them but also against others. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- What Women Really Want....
Over the last 100 years, we have made phenomenal progress in the area of women's rights. The pill has given women control over their reproductive cycles, divorce has lost its stigma, forced marriage has been outlawed, and domestic violence and stalking - crimes overwhelmingly perpetrated against women - are finally taken seriously in both the law and media. Notwithstanding all these advances, one thing that has not changed is their biological DNA and their continued sense of physical and emotional vulnerability. If you filled a room with an equal number of men and women, and asked who felt their life had been in danger in the past month, a few men and all the women would raise their hands. If you shortened that to a week, most men would lower their hands and all the women would keep their hands raised. Women are physically more vulnerable than men. The act of a woman arriving early at the office, parking her car, and walking toward the elevator is one filled with anxiety. What happens if a sexual predator is lurking behind a pillar? Most men tend to be oblivious to the ever-present danger that women face on a daily basis, and part of the reason for this oblivion is that men are buying into the toxic feminist narrative that women do not need men. Portions of the narrative are true. Women now outnumber men in the U.S. college-educated labor force. Many women are postponing or canceling altogether, plans to have a family in favour of pursuing their careers. In the sexual marketplace, the phrase “I don't need a man, but would like a man” is becoming more mainstream. The problem with all these advancements in women's rights is that women's underlying biological DNA has not changed. The one thing about evolution that people fail to understand is that changes take place over millennia, not over decades and centuries. Women in the 21st century essentially have the same DNA as the hunter-gatherers that existed thousands of years ago, when women were exposed to greater physical risks than men. Sure, men would go out and hunt for food, and be exposed to wild animals that could rip their heads off, but women were subject to a more sustained and less sporadic portfolio of risks - finding the right seed for her offspring, seeing her pregnancy to term, running the risk of death in childbirth, and then the challenges of keeping her children alive and healthy until they could fend for themselves. She looks for a mate that could act as a risk mitigant to all these dangers. Women are hypergamous - they look for a mate on the same socioeconomic level or higher. They look for men who are physically attractive and healthy because this will lead to healthy offspring. They look for men that are tall and in shape because they provide physical protection. So what happens in romantic relationships? This need to feel safe still exists and is not affected by whether or not she has children. Her primal needs are intact, but this is where it gets tricky. Modern feminism has prohibited women from being vulnerable. They are led to believe they are entitled to everything - a fulfilling career, a happy relationship, and most importantly a life of empowerment and happiness that is the fruit of their hard labor and in spite of the evils of the male-dominated hierarchy. They are told that intersexual relationships are a zero-sum game - in order for women to advance, men need to lose. So what happens in the sexual marketplace? Man meets woman, the woman tells the man that she doesn't need him, but likes having him around. The man is not quite sure how to deal with this strong successful woman, so jumps onto YouTube and the algorithm starts pushing him videos about the manosphere, alpha male, how nice guys finish last, and how women like the bad boy. Pretty soon the man loses sight of her primal need to be kept safe and feel protected. The relationship lasts a few months, maybe even a few years. The man continues with his alpha bullshit, giving her the space he thinks she needs and manages his contribution in the relationship. All the while, the woman is leaving breadcrumbs for the man. She is dropping hints about how she misses him, and how she wants to spend more time with him. He is oblivious to these clues. The most important thing women look for in a relationship is trustworthiness. You can think of trustworthiness as an insurance policy against the fear she is constantly feeling. The way to build trust is to understand the fears, needs, desires and objectives of the other person. The way you do that is to watch them, listen to them, see them and understand them. If you do not understand a woman’s need to be kept safe, she will never be able to trust you to protect her from you, and from the outside world. If you go away every second weekend on a fishing trip with your friends, and leave her alone at home, she will quickly come to the conclusion that you are not attuned to her needs. This is where it gets ugly. If a man repeatedly fails to act in the best interests of his wife, girlfriend, or partner; trust will erode in the relationship. She will not feel safe, and she will start to take her safety into her own hands, and by safety, I am not only talking about physical safety, but also about emotional safety. The man not only is not able to provide physical safety, but by continuing the relationship, she is placing her emotional safety at risk. Her self-preservation instincts will kick in, and this is where the relationship passes the point of no return. The man, by not being attuned to his partner's needs, is under the misguided impression that everything is fine until they sit down and have the conversation: something has shifted and I do not know how to fix it. By this point, she has turned off all feelings for you. Her caveman DNA has completely overtaken her emotions, and she has moved on to hunt for the next mate. While this is happening, the man is dumbstruck. He thought everything was going fine. He was playing out his alpha male role of being slightly aloof and mysterious, not realizing this may work to enhance initial attraction, but is a disastrous long-term strategy because it leaves the women feeling vulnerable and unsafe. He runs through all the good times they had - the sex, the intimacy, the weekends away, the romantic dinners, and wonders what the fuck went wrong. She seemed fine. We never fought. She never complained. What the hell happened to our perfect relationship? Has she found another man? Did I not satisfy her in bed? All those extra sessions in the gym to work on my pecs, does she not realize what a fine specimen of a human being I am? The man then doubles down and decides to go all in on the relationship. He offers everything he thinks she wants - financial security, and emotional stability. He proposes they move in together, and maybe think about getting married. She asks him why he was not all in from the beginning. He holds onto the thought that maybe she will come around to his way of thinking and there could be a reconciliation, but he could not be more wrong. She has checked out emotionally, and physically. This relationship is dead and will never be resuscitated. So what is the lesson from all this? Men need to learn to differentiate between what women say and what women do. What they say tends to be guided by social norms, politeness, political correctness, and a general desire to avoid confrontation. Men are more inclined to approach problems head on while women are more inclined to avoid conflict. For a man that is lacking in self-awareness and empathy, this is problematic. It means that his partner may encounter problems in the relationship but choose to avoid mentioning them. The fact she does not verbalize them doesn't matter. She will manifest them non-verbally in the things she does. She may withdraw affection and sex. Men mistakenly believe they are using sex as a weapon to get what they want. This is not always the case. If the woman does not feel safe around you, trusts you, or attuned to you, that emotional connection they need in order to perform sex is lacking. The reaction of most men to this is: how the hell am I supposed to read her mind? The answer to this is simple: you don't need to be a mind reader, you only need to understand her biological DNA. There is a long-standing joke that men know nothing about women. In 1939, Winston Churchill defined Russia as "a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma." Most men would argue that women are no different. This may have been a valid excuse before the Internet democratized information. Today we live in a world where there is so much information about women - their motivations, their needs, and their proclivities. We know more about their sexual fantasies, their sexual preferences, what they look for in a mate, and most importantly what they need to be happy in their romantic relationships. The only thing that men need to do is have the basic curiosity to do the research and find the answers for themselves. So what do men need to do in order to make their women feel safe? The answer is simple - be men! The challenge with this is that again we bump heads with the radical feminists who say that masculinity is toxic. There is no denying that toxic masculinity does exist on the fringes of society. I am talking about the man who returns from a long day at the factory, doesn't like what his wife prepared for dinner and starts swinging. I am not condoning that behaviour - it is reprehensible and those animals should be buried underneath the prison. The majority of men are not toxic, but they are starting to doubt that. Traditional masculine traits are strength, courage, independence, leadership, and assertiveness. If men want to maintain a long-term romantic relationship, they need to focus on strengthening these traits. Strength You need to have the confidence to walk into any room, and know you could kill everyone in that room (if you had to) or at least the speed to make a hasty exit. This requires physical strength - so get outdoors, or into the gym and work on your physical strength. No woman is going to feel safe next to a man with zero muscle tone who spends his life on a couch playing video games and jerking off to porn. Learn to use your hands to fix stuff. Know how to change a flat tire, start a fire, unblock a drain - there is a reason women fantasize about men with a toolbelt! Courage Bravery has nothing to do with being fearless - it is about acting in the face of fear. Courage is part of our caveman DNA. We are biologically designed to run into burning buildings and to storm the beaches in Normandy. This does not mean you shouild go out and look for a fight, but when you are in the movies, and the idiot behind you is conducting a running commentary, stand up, turn around, and politely ask him to shut the fuck up. Independence Many men get this one wrong, because it does require some finesse. There is no woman in the world that wants a needy man that demands constant affirmation or affection to get through the day. On the other end of the spectrum, most women are not going into a long term relationship with a man whom is emotionally detached. Men need to find a balance between the two. When your girl says she misses you, resist the urge to deliver the alpha male response of glossing over her vulnerability and telling her how he is busy ripping out the intestines of the deer her has just shot. She is being vulnerable, and it is your job to comfort her at this time of vulnerability. If you repeatedly choose to ignore this vulnerability, she will slowly lose trust in yoiur ability to look after her best interests and the relationship will slowly die. Leadership I am going to introduce you to the four most powerful words you can say to any woman: I’ve got this, babes. Women love men who take the lead. Let me give you a few examples of when you can use this magic phrase: when the bill arrives, when the headlight on her car needs replacing, when she comes home stressed from work and promised to cook you dinner, when her car needs to be taken for a service. Let me also explain what leadership is not. It is not your obligation to try and fix her problems. When she comes back from a girls weekend away, and wnats to vent about what one of her friends did, it is part of the male DNA to try and fix the problem. She is not looking for a solution. She needs someone to listen to her. So sit back, listen attentively, and every couple of minutes, use another powerful four word phrase: that bitch is crazy! Assertiveness Assertiveness is the ability to communicate what you want or need in a clear and powerful manner while at the same time respecting the needs of your partner. By being assertive, you build self confidence and leadership. It also leads to a decline in stress and anxiety becuase you are able to chart a clear path for the future. It makes you courageous and more equipped to meet the challenges and risks that lie ahead. It makes you a powerful communicator, which in turn leaves no doubt to those around you of your intentions. Assertiveness wil help you get what you need, because many of us make the incorrect assumption that other people know what we need. #bitcoinusa#cryptocurrencies#binary#bitcoinminning#forexlifestyle#investing#binaryoptions#bitcoincash#crypto#cryptotrading#bitcoin
- The Cure for Male Friendlessness
How many close friends do you have, and by close, I mean someone you can call at 3 am in an emergency? I am talking about someone to whom you can reveal your deepest and darkest secrets without fear of judgment. Data indicates that friendlessness is becoming more common, and this trend was exacerbated during the pandemic. COVID taught us many things. One of the most important was that it tested the quality of our relationships. It highlighted weak relationships and consolidated strong relationships, and left a huge void in the middle. Pre-COVID, it is possible the majority of your social interaction was at work on a superficial level. When we were forced to work from home, the majority of our “meaningful” social interaction terminated. We also saw a spike in divorce which has been a major driver of male friendlessness. Wives arrange social interactions, and most gatherings are with their friends, and men spend lots of time making friends with the spouses of their wife's friends. When marriages rupture, those friends are no longer in play because their wives force these friends to side with the ex-wife. Friendlessness is not only the plight of middle-aged men - it is also affecting younger men. Traditional bonding grounds are no longer inhabited by these men. They are not going to university, they are unemployed, they do not go to church, and they are not playing team sports. Instead, they withdraw into the online world of gaming, which gives them a sense of community, but no meaningful friendships. Now that we understand the problem, we need to understand the wrong solution. To address the issue of male friendlessness, the common mistake is assuming that men and women make and manage friendships in the same way. Women seek each other out. They go on weekends away where they sip on chilled rose and tell each other how much they love them and how important they are in their lives. Men do not and will not ever do that. It is not part of our evolutionary biology. Women were then the ones who stayed behind in the villages and raised the kids. They relied on other women in their daily chores and duties. Men on the other hand went out on hunting parties to ensure the village was fed and nourished physically. So what does this mean in the 21st century? The ancient rule of hunting and fighting wars no longer exists, but the feminine role of childbearing and raising children remains (although feminists would encourage women to shun them like the plague). Now that we no longer live in villages, traditional bonds men used to share no longer exist. Men and women connect in friendships in different ways. Women don't need a reason to get together with their friends. They can agree amongst themselves to go for a weekend away to the wine region. Implicit in this invitation is that they will share, confide, complain, and drink. Men need a reason to get together. They need a common purpose - like watching a football game or going fishing. Australia, in an effort to address the issue of men's mental health and wellness, started to set up meet groups but no one arrived. Someone then came up with the idea of men's sheds. This is what these guys get up to according to their website: Men’s sheds may do a variety of activities from manual crafts to gardening to beekeeping. Some may undertake community projects such as making toys for local childcare groups. Men’s sheds may provide an opportunity to learn new skills such as first aid. They may hold health and well-being events and provide contacts for men to follow up on their health needs. Men’s sheds can also provide company or an opportunity to make friends. If you decide to set up a men's support group, it is important to attach an activity to the event. The activity does not need to be noble and meaningful, like building homes in marginal communities. It can simply be to meet up at a pub to watch a sports game, go hiking or collect garbage on the beach. Around this, the most important thing to do is build trust. It’s about creating a space where someone feels safe enough to risk telling the truth about themselves and know they won’t be judged or shamed. Your group will be much stronger for this and will grow into something more than a pure support group. #bitcoinusa#cryptocurrencies#binary#bitcoinminning#forexlifestyle#investing#binaryoptions#bitcoincash#crypto#cryptotrading#bitcoin
- How to Naturally Increase Your Testosterone
Testosterone levels have been declining in men by one percent per annum since the 1980s which means that a 25-year-old man today has the same levels of testosterone (T levels) as a 50-year-old man had in the 1990s. There are numerous reasons for this, which is the topic of another blog. The subject of how to naturally boost these levels is the topic of this blog. 1) Sleep Patterns You want to follow your circadian rhythms. During the day, light exposure causes the master clock to send signals that generate alertness and help keep us awake and active. As night falls, the master clock initiates the production of melatonin, a hormone that promotes sleep, and then keeps transmitting signals that help us stay asleep through the night. Exposing yourself to the first and last sun of the day is a great way to get in sync with your circadian rhythm. The worst thing to do is expose yourself to too much light after nightfall. The blue light emitted by your cell phone screen restrains the production of melatonin, the hormone that controls your circadian rhythm. This makes it even more difficult to fall asleep and wake up the next day. Ideally, you want to halt the use of your phone a couple of hours before your bedtime or you can turn on the blue light filter on your phone as soon as the sun goes down. Men who sleep 5 hours per night have significantly smaller testicles than men who sleep 7-8 hours. Men who sleep 5 hours per night have the same testosterone levels as men 10 years their senior. Reed Hastings, CEO of Netflix, when asked who/what his biggest competitor was, replied "sleep". This is what happens when you choose to watch another episode of Breaking Bad instead of hitting the sack. 1) It Makes You Stupid A bunch of medical geeks ran an experiment. They created two groups – one that got a solid 8 hours of Zs, and another that was deprived of sleep. Everyone was then placed in an MRI scan while a list of new facts was communicated to see how the brains reacted. Both groups were then tested on their ability to retain these new facts. The deprived group performed 40% worse than the rested group. Million Men are masters of education and knowledge. To be a high-value man, you need to be continually learning – finding new ways to make money, solving complex problems, understanding client needs, interacting with a dynamic and vibrant world, and being exposed to new and potentially life-changing experiences. If your brain is not firing on all cylinders, you are missing opportunities and living below your potential. If that doesn’t scare the living shit out of you, consider sleep spindles. These are big powerful brainwaves that occur during the deepest phases of sleep. What the fuck does this mean? It is simple, it is your brain backing up your short-term memories/experiences and moving them into a more permanent file that can be called on in the medium to longer term. This file transfer does not take place as effectively if you are sleep-deprived because you are not benefitting from those deep phases of sleep. As you get older, you start to sleep less. This explains memory loss and dementia. If that doesn’t get you lunging for the remote control to turn off Netflix and into bed, then you are an idiot. 2) It Weakens Your Body What happens twice a year and confuses the living shit out of hundreds of millions of people? Daylight savings. It is the practice of setting clocks forward by one hour in the spring ("spring forward") and setting clocks back by one hour in autumn ("fall back"). In short, and I had to think about this, you get 1 hour less sleep in “spring forward” and 1 hour more in “fall back”. Here is the fact that will make your testicles shrink to the size of raisins: in the US, hospitals reported a 24% INCREASE in heart attacks the day after spring forward and 21% DECREASE in heart attacks the day after fall back! Coincidence? Not bloody likely. If a one-off 1-hour adjustment can have such a huge impact, imagine the impact of sustained multi-hour deviations. We all have immune systems. These systems have immune cells – cold-blooded snipers that are highly trained in the discipline of eliminating foreign attacks on the body. You want these fuckers to have a deadly aim and be ruthless killers 24/7. Studies have shown that sleeping only four hours per night, for one night, reduces the accuracy of these snipers by 70%. Your snipers become distracted - it is like taking them to a strip club and throwing 18 Jägermeisters down their throats. In June 2019, a working group convened by the International Agency for Research on Cancer [IARC] concluded that “night shift work” is probably carcinogenic to humans. Fuck! This is a fatal body blow to a phrase we often use “I will sleep when I am dead”. It is now becoming apparent that death will come sooner if you don’t sleep. So what does this have to do with becoming a high-value man? High-value men are masters instead of minions. What is a minion? A minion is a follower, a slave, a yes-man, a lackey, or a parasite. He has no backbone – he is controlled by others. Everyone walks over a minion. He is a passive victim – life happens to him, and he does not make life happen. A master is in control. He makes things happen. He takes charge and takes responsibility for his successes, and his failures. He takes control of his mind, his body, and his money. Good quality sleep allows masters to optimize their minds and bodies. Good quality sleep is the quick and easiest life hack to mastery in your life and become a high-value man. 2) Loose Weight If you are overweight and you have plans of someday fathering children, you need to be aware of the uphill challenge you will face unless you get started to lose weight. Obesity is known to be associated with impaired testicular function, potentially resulting in androgen deficiency and sub-fertility. Now it is clear that fast food meals consumed by obese or overweight men have an immediate negative impact on testicular performance and testosterone production. While many facts are involved in the underlying cause of obesity-related male hypogonadism, Flinders University, and UniSA researchers have found that a high fat intake from ‘fast food’ meals has a decisively negative effect on a man’s serum testosterone levels. Their investigation into the impact of dietary fat on testicular endocrine function showed some alarming results. They found that the ingestion of a high-fat Fast Food mixed meal, which is a common practice for obese men, produced a 25% fall in serum testosterone within an hour of eating, with levels remaining suppressed below the fasting baseline for up to 4 hours. These results – which only investigated the impact on overweight and obese men, and therefore may not apply to lean men – suggest that the passage of fat through the intestinal tract elicits a response that indirectly elicits a post-prandial fall in testosterone. One way to lose weight is to transform your diet. All food in its raw and natural state is filled with goodness. Over the decades man has processed all the goodness out of food. So the rule is simple - the more a food has been processed, the lower the quality of the fuel. So how do you know if food has been processed? It is simple, when you look at it, you haven't got a fucking clue where it came from. If the food comes in a box, it is probably processed. Take a big fat juicy doughnut. Do you think some farmers planted doughnut seeds and then harvested a crop of doughnuts? Of course not - doughnuts are full of processed shit - sugar, flour, fructose, glucose, colorants, preservatives, etc. Add to this list food like bread, cookies, chips, fruit loops, and other sugary cereals, sweets, etc. Let's now move across to high-quality foods. When you walk into a supermarket, what foods do you ordinarily find close to the walls? Fruit, vegetables, meat, chicken, fish, milk, cheese. When you look at these products, you have a pretty good idea of how they existed in their pre supermarket state. These foods have not been processed. This is high-quality fuel. This is a simplistic look at diet and serves as the first filter. The next step is to work out what foods work for you and what foods make you feel shit. Food is more than fuel. It also affects the way you feel. Your stomach is a second brain. What does that mean? Firstly, have you ever noticed how you can be eating and then all of a sudden you feel full. Your stomach brain is a little retarded. It takes 20 minutes for your stomach brain to tell your cerebral brain you are full. That is problematic. If you are eating dinner and you are stuffing your face, at 6 pm you are full, but you don't feel full so you keep shoveling calories into your face. By 6.19 pm you have offloaded another 500 calories into a full stomach. At 6.20 pm the signal arrives and you feel stuffed. You feel lethargic and you want to take a nap. You may also feel a little guilty as you move to the couch, loosen your belt, and collapse onto the soft cushioning like a big lump of lard. So this is what you want to do. 1) Eat slowly - you want to limit your calories per minute consumption. If you pack 500 calories in 20 minutes, that is 25 calories per minute. If you can cut that to 10 per minute, in the 20-minute delay between stomach and brain, you will only overload by 200 calories. 2) Pay attention to what foods affect your stomach. Lactose has become public enemy number one. I love dairy - milk, cheese, yogurt, and ice cream all make me excited, but lately, they have been upsetting my stomach and putting me into a shit mood. I feel less energetic and powerful so I try and stay away from them. 3) Beware of Certain Chemicals Every man has some estrogen and estrogen plays an essential role in male well-being. For optimal wellness men should have no less than 4 parts testosterone to 1 part estrogen. When the estrogen-to-testosterone ratio is balanced a man experiences well-being, mentally, sexually, and physically. In our modern world unfortunately men are being subjected to estrogen-mimicking substances called xenoestrogens which lower their testosterone. These chemicals are unfortunately becoming more and more common in our foods and environment. This has led to an epidemic of younger and younger men with low testosterone. Thanks to the chemical industry, you’re putting untold numbers of endocrine-disrupting chemicals called xenoestrogens into your blood every day that mimic the female hormone estrogen. Here are some of the worst offenders . . . Phthalates Used to soften plastic. Found in vinyl flooring, detergents, automotive plastics, soaps and shampoos, deodorants, perfumes, hair sprays, plastic bags, and food packaging Bisphenol A (BPA) Common in plastic products such as reusable water bottles, food cans, and dental sealants. According to the Environmental Working Group, which publishes its “Dirty Dozen of Endocrine Disruptors,” BPA is #1. Perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA) Used in water- and grease-resistant food coatings and non-stick cookware. Bovine growth hormones are estrogen-mimicking and growth-promoting chemicals added to commercial dairy products. Metalloestrogens are a new class of estrogen-mimicking compounds. They include a number of metals, such as aluminum, copper, lead, mercury, barium, cadmium, tin cobalt, and others which are added to thousands of consumer products, including vaccines. When these estrogen mimickers get into your blood, they adhere to estrogen receptors in your cells. Since the receptors take in information for the cells, this allows the chemical estrogens to instruct your body to look and feel more like a woman. This triggers a series of physiological events. For one, a man’s testosterone levels drop and estrogen levels rise. When that happens, fat starts to accumulate in his breasts and belly. His muscles shrink, and he becomes soft. He also feels tired or moody and lacks sexual desire. It’s a vicious circle. When estrogen gets the upper hand, it’s downhill from there. Where Are These Chemicals Coming From? Unfortunately, xenoestrogens seem to be everywhere – in our foods, skincare, personal care, and household cleaning products. Their effect on our body and overall well-being can be quite alarming, yet there are things you can do to avoid or minimize their effect. Here are some key areas where these man-made “feminizing” chemicals can be found… Food They’re found in most non-organic fruits and vegetables treated with pesticides, herbicides, and fertilizers. They’re also found in additives and preservatives in beverages and packaged processed foods of all kinds, including cookies, sodas, bread, muffins, cereal, chocolate, ice cream, and frozen foods. Receipts Bisphenol A (BPA) is used to make thermal paper for grocery store receipts, bus tickets, airplane tickets, and most everything that’s “instantly printed” after your purchase. Toilet Paper According to one study, toilet paper contains BPA. That’s because toilet paper is mostly recycled BPA-laden thermal paper mentioned above. Plastics Plastic products may be the #1 reason why male testosterone levels are plummeting globally. They’re filled with estrogen mimics and other testosterone-lowering chemicals such as BPA and phthalates. Think all BPA-free products are safe? Nope! According to one research report, many manufacturers simply replaced BPA with another less-known chemical called Bisphenol S (BPS). This is equally as toxic, but research suggests in some ways worse than BPA. And even if they don’t have BPS, they’re likely to contain other estrogen mimics. The list of plastic products is almost endless and is a part of our everyday life. They include such things as plastic bottles, Tupperware containers, plastic bags, plastic toys, inflatable toys, garden hoses, vinyl flooring, vinyl shower curtains, and much more. Canned Foods and Non-stick Cookware The epoxy lining in nearly all aluminum cans is made with BPA. Especially with acidic contents, like tomatoes or soda, then it breaks down the lining and you’re drinking BPA. Stainless steel cans are a safer alternative since they don’t use BPA linings as the case with aluminum cans. Non-stick cookware such as Teflon releases endocrine-disrupting perfluoroalkyl compounds when overheated. Cleaning & Personal Care Products Most major brands of cleaning & beauty products are loaded with chemical estrogen ingredients, such as laundry detergents, dryer sheets, artificial air fresheners, fabric softeners, shampoos, moisturizers, deodorants, hair sprays, perfumes & colognes, spray tanning solutions, makeup, toothpaste, and personal hygiene products. Old Water Pipes Not all, but some old water pipes were coated with BPA to extend their life. Numerous studies have found traces of BPA, phthalates, and other endocrine disruptors in the U.S. water supply. Highly recommended: Use a water filter! Pesticides, Herbicides & Fertilizers One of the worst offenders is glyphosate, a herbicide developed by GMO giant Monsanto. It goes by the name of Roundup and is used on “Roundup Ready” crops. This means Roundup can be used on those crops genetically modified to resist the herbicide. So What can we do? We can be empowered with the knowledge of how to limit our intake of these substances. Sadly however in our modern world, it can be nearly impossible to be unaffected by these everyday chemicals. Checking testosterone levels biannually with blood tests and being aware of the symptoms of low testosterone. Working with a well-informed healthcare professional who can help you correct hormone imbalances can help you be your best self for your family, for your self and for the world. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- The Three Most Biggest Male Challenges
The dating marketplace has never been more challenging for men. I heard the story of a young man who worked as a bomb disposal expert. He is the guy in the movies sweating bullets working out whether to cut the blue or the red wire. It is difficult to find a more dangerous job - it makes working on a deep sea oil rig look like a walk in the park. This man was terrified of approaching women. It was a fear that rendered him immobile. For me, this is a deafening cry for help from our fellow men and an indication that men are facing a dating crisis. In this blog, we look at three of the biggest male challenges in the dating marketplace, and how to overcome them. Challenge 1: Fear of Rejection It is our lack of confidence and fear of rejection that affects the way we approach women. It can be in the form of going up to a woman in the grocery store, or the first offline date after matching on a dating app. We believe that appearance is all important, and we feel that if we are not endowed with a chiseled jawline, are not tall and athletic, and are not charismatic, we are going to be rejected. This affects the first impression we leave on a woman, it affects our tone of voice, posture, and body language, and forces them off on the wrong foot. Solution 1: Numb the Fear In the words of Pink Floyd, we need to become comfortably numb to our fear of rejection, and the only way is to get rejected a bunch of times. The first rejection is painful, the second a lot less - and by the time we get to the fifth or sixth, we should find ourselves in an “I don't give a fuck anymore” state of mind. We are taking a foul-tasting medicine and this is helping us turn the volume down on our approach anxiety. Let me clue you in on something - life and rejection go hand in hand. Your friends, colleagues, girlfriends, wives, and acquaintances are going to let you down all the time. The quicker you come to terms with the fact that rejection is more the rule than the exception, the happier your life will be. It is also important you learn from the rejection. This exercise of rejection numbing is also an opportunity to hone your skills. Remember that the objective is not to get rejected. The objective is to get the woman's number and a follow-up encounter - the rejection comes as a byproduct because not everyone you meet will see you are being part of their immediate plans. After every rejection, you need to analyze your approach and make small tweaks as you work towards a more complete and rounded product. Challenge 2: Lack of Conversation Skills Our conversation strategy ties back into our inherent fear of rejection. When speaking to women, we tend to adopt a defensive approach. We are playing not to lose instead of playing to win. We irrationally believe this encounter is our best, and potentially only shot, and we have to make it work at all costs. Men who are successful with women play to win - they take the risk. They will ask edgy and potentially controversial questions and they have no fear of losing because they know rejection is often not a reflection on them. They know that if they get rejected, it does not mean that they are objectively undesirable - they understand that at the time of rejection, you did not fit into their immediate plans. The rejection was because of her situation and not yours. Men who adopt a defensive strategy tend to make similar generic statements which is a losing strategy for two reasons - firstly women can see they are generic and unoriginal, and secondly, men are not projecting their true selves and women can sense that too. Solution 2: Make an Impact When talking to a woman for the first time, you need to be impactful and work hard at making a connection. You need to read her communication cues and develop a strategy that will optimize the chances of building attraction. You have five to ten minutes to make this connection, so you are under a little pressure because if you don't maximize that window, she could lose interest and it may be impossible to bring her back. You also need to work on your "interesting". High-value men are interesting, and if you ask any woman, they will tell you that interesting is sexy. What does it mean to be interesting? Interesting people tell incredible stories and lead unusual lives. The source of their magnetism is their curiosity. They are always excited to explore the world, and this curious energy radiates outward. This will give you an edge in the conversation game. Challenge 3: No Escalation Most of us do not escalate and build on the date. On every date, we need to engage in playful teasing, flirting, and building sexual tension. There is a risk of keeping the conversation platonic - it creates some confusion in her. It leaves her with doubts as to whether or not we like her. It is not a good idea to be playing poker on this first date and keeping our cards close to our chests -we need to give her a glimpse of at least one of our cards because that will keep her interested in seeing our hand and strategy. We need to get both her emotional and mental attention. Successful flirting speaks to her primal side, a side that most men do not know about and make no effort to understand. Solution 3: Tricks to Building Sexual Tension We need to understand the questions that women are asking themselves when they first come into contact with us on a date: are we high value, do we have other options and are we good in bed? We need to drop clues that will enable her to reach her own conclusions, but we need to be careful how we drop those clues. Telling her that we have millions in the bank, have fucked 100 women, and have a large cock is not going to work for her, because it is not how women build attraction. Fifty Shades of Grey has sold more copies than Ernest Hemingway's Old Man and the Sea. It is adult erotica written specifically for women. It is not sex from start to end - it builds up slowly and powerfully. It is subtle, complex, intriguing, and arousing. That is what you need to know in building this sexual tension. But you need to be smart about this. It is like a game of chess. You make a small move and see how she reacts. If she leaves the door open, then take the opening. If you say, not many people know this about me, but I have Scottish ancestry and own a kilt. If she says that she loves a man in a kilt, you can take the opening and say, do you know that real Scotsmen don't wear anything under the kilt? If she replies, oh really, how about you? - then you are making progress and you can now start to move for her queen. If she doesn't pick up on the cue, no problem, you need to make another move. It might take three or four moves before you find an opening, but you need to keep looking. If after ten attempts nothing is sticking, you may need to cut your losses and move on to the next one, and yes, women are like London busses, when one pulls away, another will pull up in a few minutes! #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business
- 10 Signs Your Girlfriend May be Emotionally Immature
Emotional immaturity is simple to define but more complicated to identify. Emotionally immature people are ruled by their emotions, they have no control over them, and most of their decisions are based on how they are feeling. It is dangerous to be in a relationship with this kind of person. In this blog, we will look at different ways in which emotional immaturity can manifest. 1) She cannot talk about Her Emotions She is unable to verbalize how she feels in any depth. She will say she is angry, upset, or confused but will not be able to explain why she is feeling these emotions. The way she expresses her emotions is through her actions. She may ignore your messages for a couple of days, or after you try to have a deep conversation, she will ask if you could have it some other time, in a different situation. 2) She is a Runner She does not know how to handle stress, and when a problem arises, she would rather break up than figure out how to fix the situation. She will say things like “I cannot see how we can fix this”. She has limited tools at her disposal to cope with stress. She’s not emotionally capable of handling the stressors in her life — although she could develop this capacity. She may be doing the best she can for her level of growth at that moment. 3) No Compromise They are inflexible. Plans need to be made around her, and if they are not done in this way, she is unhappy. This inability to put herself in the shoes of someone can be tiresome and will sap your energy. 4) She Feels Entitled If you’ve ever met a “Karen”, you likely recognize the signs of emotional immaturity. The set of behaviors our society has named “Karen” include weaponized privilege and a sense of entitlement. Their perception is that the world revolves around them, and when things don’t go their way, they assume it’s unfair. 5) She Demands Attention Another common red flag a woman is emotionally immature is she demands attention rather than asking for it. She’s the partner who doesn’t want you to spend time with friends or family, the person who expects her friends to drop everything to be there for her at any hour. She doesn’t ask for what she wants. She demands and expects it. 6) She Takes Everything Personally One of the main signs of emotional immaturity in a woman is she takes other people’s behaviors personally. The emotionally immature woman assumes every action and reaction is in direct response to her presence. 7) She Gets Defensive When Confronted Emotional immaturity also comes out when she’s confronted about her behaviors. You’ll recognize her immediate defensiveness. Because she’s uncomfortable, she may try to direct the blame on you or find a way to shift the attention away from her feelings of humiliation, rejection, or disappointment. Because she hasn’t learned to articulate her feelings, it’s easier to react — badly — to any confrontation, no matter how gentle. 8) She Has a History of High Drama Relationships You’ll notice that emotionally immature people don’t just have a history of bad relationships. They have a history of high drama. It’s not just in their romantic relationships either. Their family relationships and friendships are equally filled with conflict. Every story she recounts of drama shows evidence of her lack of emotional maturity. She hasn’t learned to manage conflict, communicate calmly, or address her feelings. 9) She Cannot Admit to Mistakes and Will Not Apologize for Them Emotionally immature people have a hard time admitting they made a mistake — and an even harder time apologizing for their behavior. In fact, if you get an apology at all, it will be the kind that avoids responsibility and actually makes their behavior someone else’s fault. 10) She Holds a Grudge It’s unsurprising that a woman who is emotionally immature is a champion grudge holder. She doesn’t yet see the value in forgiving, and she’s never seen the benefit of forgetting either. Instead, she is likely to bring up past conflicts in every single new one. So, there you have it guys. You want to stay away from these people like the plague. Life is hard enough as it is, but to find yourself in a relationship with an emotionally immature person will systematically suck all the enjoyment out of life and leave you stressed out and brokenhearted. #lifecoach#motivation#lifecoaching#coaching#love#mindset#coach#inspiration#selflove#life#success#selfcare#lifestyle#mentalhealth#mindfulness#personaldevelopment#entrepreneur#goals#happiness#meditation#loveyourself#healing#motivationalquotes#lifequotes#positivevibes#fitness#businesscoach#motivationalspeaker#business